I will have that VBAC ( Vaginal Birth After Caesarean)!

I've been talking about this for some time now, but I hadn't quite made up my mind yet. But the courage to do so has grown as I read more and more on VBACs and especially after meeting Ginny Phang, the person I will engage as my doula.

Mark and I met her on Sunday. And her conviction, knowledge and just, "general warmth" impressed us. Plus she has a 90% success rate with VBACs and infact most of her clients are VBAC candidates. So, we felt like we were in good hands.

What's even more amazing is that after listening to her talk about birth without pain relief through "hypnobirthing," we are even going to try that out!

Can you imagine? From Caesarean TO natural birth, and even one possibly without pain relief! Ha.

Ok, it is not some gung ho decision I have just decided to make, throwing all caution and sanity to the wind.

For one, hypnobirthing is not some new age thing, where someone holds a pendulum infront of you and hypnotises you. And in fact, you don't lose control, but on the contrary, gain FULL control over yourself and your birth. From what I understand so far, it's is very much a "mind over matter" thing, teaching your mind and your body to relax, have control over the pain of each contraction and letting the natural birth process take over and proceed as efficiently as possible.

To me, that makes perfect sense. In everyday life, we tell ourselves to "calm down' whenever we get flustered or nervous before a big meeting or something. And overcoming panic almost always results in a successful outcome. I for one, am a true believer in positive thinking and strongly feel that once you set your mind to something, you can achieve it. At heart, I am actually quite a pessimist but willing myself to be positive, banishing negative thoughts has helped me go a long long way!

So, hypnobirthing makes sense to me and I want to give it a shot. Mark has expressed great concern though and does not want me to rule out epidural. So, I'm not going to but I want to try it out first. If I can't cope, I will use epidural. But let's see.

Tomorrow, I am going to meet a new doctor who is supportive of VBACS. If I like him, I will switch doctors. I love my current doctor at TMC but I just know I will not be able to do my VBAC with her , and I don't want to end up quarreling in the delivery suite. Ha, those of you who know me will know I am too mild to do that, so I will probably end up agreeing to a Caesearean again. So, it's best that I change doctors if I have decided to go ahead with my VBAC. What I need is support from all ends now.

Wish me luck as I embark on this new journey. I am not some new age mummy. Please, I am a no. 1 scaredy cat at times too. But I am more confident doing this the second time round and much more well informed. And I just want to have more control this time over how my birth turns out. If anything, I have to try for a natural birth now as success rates for a VBAC get lower the third time. So , this is it!