"Ah Boo Chuck!"

Christmas 2008

2008-12-25T23:09:00.005+08:00

Hectic Hectic month...but one to remember for:-

1. Our very first Christmas tree We finally got one at The Verge , (formerly known as Tekka Mall). And the kids had a whale of a time decorating it.

2. The two girls grasping the meaning of Christmas a bit better ..... at least now they understand it is Jesus's Birthday and the day Jesus was born. They sort of understand that it's a time for sharing and giving... though they have yet to fully practise it. It's still way tough explaining the part about Jesus dying on the cross for us. For now, it's still, " Why does Jesus's hands have blood?" Our answer: " The naughty uncles poked him." Next year... next year...

3. Me having the worst flu ever 3 weeks of fever, cough, cold , 2 rounds of antibiotics, and still recovering! I know I know it seems like I am always sick isn't it. Doctors diagnosed it as Mycoplasma, a particularly resistant type of bacteria. Oh well, I'll remember it as the "100 day cough" Sure feels like it.

4. My first "designer" bag from Mark, my darling husband. He always amazes me with how he manages to still find the time to get me something even though he's so busy helping me with the family and dealing with his work and studies... Anyway, I got a Kate Spade! Shereen, I know you'll be saying, " About time right." Ha, I'm slow on this. Anyway, this is my work bag for filling up with my inventory files and stuff, when meeting suppliers or doing other business stuff.

5. The loads of presents the gals received Thank you all Aunties and Uncles! Despite all the great educational toys received, you know girls are girls when they zoomed in on the princess crown and jewellery set.

6. Having my family around me this Christmas. Never take this for granted.

7. Having thought of the best Christmas gift for my dad-in-law. In order to finally get him off his butt and in shape, Mark and I got him a personal trainer gift voucher for 5 sessions! Never forget his face when he received it. Dunno know whether to laugh or cry.

Have a blessed Christmas Everyone!

Ally and Rachel - When the two cousins are feeling loving...

2008-11-20T20:48:00.003+08:00

Sisterly Love

2008-11-20T20:37:00.003+08:00

That's Angie hiding in her sister's lap as she is afraid of some monster on the TV.

Taking care of our bones

2008-11-18T19:14:00.009+08:00

Recently, I had my annual health screening. Everything was fine and dandy except for one aspect - my bones. My bone density readings classified me as having osteopenia. That's basically the stage before osteoperosis. In simple terms, my doctor told me that if I did not do anything and left things as they were, I would have osteoperosis by the time I hit my late 40s.

Wow, scary. Up to now, I am still unsure if it is as serious as she makes it out to be, as my readings are osteopenic for only one hip (at -1.2). My spine and all are normal. Normal levels are from -1 and above. But it serves as a good wake up call. On hindsight, I think I do have a number of the risk factors for low bone mass.

* Low body weight - I've always been one of the lightest around.... at a grand weight of 43 kg before and after two pregnancies. No more, no less. I always joked that I had light bones, who would have known it was actually true!
* Low calcium intake - Never really been a milk guzzler. I've known many who drink their milk in the morning and evening since they were young. My parents never bugged me to, and so I drank when I wanted to - at best occasionally. During my second pregnancy, I didn't even take calcium supplements while breastfeeding, tho' I did while pregnant and while breastfeeding my first child. Calcium as an adult was mainly through my milk tea and cereal and vegetables - so I was probably way short of my min daily requirements of at least 1000mg.
* Lack of weight bearing exercises Meaning exercise that puts pressure on the bones and causes them to grow, increase in bone mass. Well, while I did run pretty regularly in the uni, the past years have seen me swimming alot ( as I prefer the water) But swimming is definitely not weight bearing!

So, anyway,it was actually a good thing that I took the bone density test. It's not something many people do and I only did it as it was part of the whole health screening package. In fact, I almost did not do it, as it never occurred to me that I should worry about my bones at my age.

So, just want to advise all you mummies and ladies out there to make sure you get your calcium ( at least 1000 mg/a day) if you are pregnant or nursing. And get your weight bearing exercise. We all hit our peak bone density mass at age 30, so its important to make sure it's as high as possible by the time you reach this age. And from there on, we start losing bone mass and if you were low to begin with, chances of getting osteopenia or osteoperosis are higher.

My action plan now to up my bone mass includes:
* Calcium pills I take two 500 mg pills a day, since my bones are so pathetic. I was also supposed to take a bone -growing medication but I put that on hold temporarily as I may be trying for a third and I can't take that if I am.
* Running with stair climbing for 1/2 hour (2 times a week, working up to 3)
* Osteloates or modified pilates with more weight bearing involved once a week. I love pilates at Sky Pilates and contrary to popular opinion, pilates can be weight bearing. We just do exercises with much more resistance and weight, and avoid most forms of bending forward to prevent injury to the spine.
*Light weights and resistance band exercises ( 2- 3 times a week... this one I am still working on.. only managing once a week for now)
*Loads of calcium enriched foods. This includes 1-2 cups of milk a day, calcium enriched snacks like figs and apricots, spinach, sweet potato, yoghurt. I've also made sure I'm always eating well and not skipping meals.

I hope my next scan in Feb will reveal better results! As for now, all my milk drinking has made me put on 2 kg in the past two months so I'm now 45.2kg - my heaviest non pregnant weight ever! I've now discovered LOW FAT Anlene Calcium Enriched milk ( It's great as a small packet packs in 500mg calcim, 4x the amount of calcium from a regular glass) So, I dont have to drink so much! Realised that skinny as I am, loads of full cream milk will make anybody fat. :( Oops!

So ladies, take care of your bones. Don't take them for granted. There are no symptoms for osteoperosis except when you have your first fracture! In fact, get a bone density test during your next health screening. It's a painless easy test like an X Ray. They just lay you down and do a scan of your spine and hips. Takes about 10 mins in all. Prevention is better than the cure!

What do you want to be when you grow up?

2008-11-09T20:48:00.004+08:00

A few months makes a world of a difference when babies are under a year.

When they become toddlers, the difference is less stark. But still.

Here's a conversation we had with our two girls Ally (4 years) and Angie (2 years)

So what do you want to be when you grow up?

Ally: Errrm, a teacher!

And how about you, Angie?

Angie: I want to be a DINOSAUR!

Somebody's been watching too much Barney......

Hunting for a Xmas tree

2008-11-07T15:52:00.002+08:00

Hey, does anyone know where to get Xmas trees nowadays?

I used to go to Concourse - they had everything! but it's now gone. I'm not sure if Tekka, where some of the tenants went to, sells the trees and ornaments.

Appreciate any comments. Otherwise, my only recourse is Ikea. But I happen to need the tree by next week and Ikea's aren't available yet. Where did all the concourse fellas go to?

Hiao Pors!

2008-11-02T23:04:00.000+08:00

P1 again

2008-11-02T20:33:00.002+08:00

So after the last post about considering doing some volunteering next year so we can get Ally into a top school in our neighbourhood, things have changed.

Well, we initially thought TN ( no prizes for guessing which school this is considering we stay in the east coast) would be great for its rich Chinese roots and grounding. We still think so. Only now, we are not so sure if Ally will take well to what has been said is a very "highly pressured" environment. The same thing you often hear of all the top primary schools.

It may be too early to say, but from what Mark and I have observed .. Ally is a very gentle, sweet, hardworking girl. Above average intelligence but not brilliant. :) Likes cultural stuff like drawing (she takes after her artistic grandmother), singing, acting and dancing ballet. Has a flair for languages and picks things up fast. But here's the deciding factor, she often needs lots of encouragement and praise to keep her confidence level high. This is common for all kids, but we can see the difference when compared to her little sis, Angeline, who is filled with self confidence to the point of arrogance (:)) So, basically, we are not sure if Ally's temperament would suit the pressure that TN may give her.

Of course, we won't know till we let her try studying in the school. But then again, perhaps what we do know is enough to send her to a less competitive environment where she will develop a better sense of self esteem and thrive. Most of all, we want her to ENJOY school.

Then there's another big factor. My in-laws (both teachers), especially my father-in law, are dead set against TN. They seem to have some vendetta against the school. Crux of the matter- as teachers, they have seen how the school places so much emphasis on churning out good students to the extent that lesser students are asked to leave. My father-in-law 's school took in a number of these students who were asked to leave the school, and these students were grateful for the principal giving them a chance. I think he has a strong distaste for what he calls a lack of compassion on the school's part in their quest for a good ranking. He feels we should know that the environment can be very pressurising and that all the students there have to take tuition. He's very against us sending Ally there, though of course we will still have the last say. Tho' if anything happens and we have to take her out, we will probably not hear the end of it. I only know of one TN graduate and he seems very well adjusted and intelligent. So perhaps, TN is a great school if you can take the pressure.

The clear choice would be then to send her to KC, my old school. The argument is that hey, I turned out fine (not scholar material but well rounded enough). Plus it's a convent which is good for maintaining a strong religious grounding (we're catholics), and I know it's strong in drama and the arts. No doubt it is not a top school and the mandarin standard is probably average, but that can be supplemented with fun mandarin enrichment classes.

Still pondering. Would love to hear any comments. Deciding to go to TN is a big decision considering that we're not alumni. So we've got to do volunteer work, or even try to get onto the volunteer list. We're under 1KM when we move to our new place so that raises our chances slightly. But we also have to do other stuff like join Hokkien Huay Kwan or something. Mark and I are also tempted to just screw the whole thing and go to my old school, KC. Really nothing wrong with that.

Any other EAST people out there, with kids going to school in 1 to 2 years time?

Ally Crack Me Ups #1

2008-11-02T14:33:00.002+08:00

Every Sunday, after mass, we like to go up to a small petition/offering box at the front of the church, to donate some money.

We get the kids to do it and we tell them it's to help the poor people.

One of these times, Ally stands for a significant amount of time in front of the box, peering into the opening slot. When asked what she's doing, she replies:

" Looking for the poor people inside the box. Where are they?!"

Some pics!

2008-10-30T17:56:00.004+08:00

The three amigos who always hang out together - Angie, Rachel (Looking so sexy! Is that cleavage?!) and Ally.

Handsome Ruebens, Rachel's brother and Ally and Alison's cousin. He's only making an appearance now as he gets older and starts to play with the girls more! Handsome boy isn't he?

Angie and Ruebens

Finally, a BBQ we had at our place recently for about 5 couples and their kids. Half are not in the picture ( either in the toilet weeing, in the pool getting wet or somewhere changing their diapers). It was fun but I must say BBQs are different with toddlers. I don't think I ate enough, no time to sit down and pig out!

SHE'S OK!

2008-10-30T17:35:00.002+08:00

After receiving all these concerned queries about Ally from my friends (Thank you guys for your concern), I thought I had better write an entry to tell you all is fine! Ally has not spoken about it since and she's her usual self. Maybe she gets a little scared when she walks past the "area" at night but then many kids are afraid of the dark. Only setback to our sleep training for her is that now, she needs the bedroom door open in the afternoon and at night when she goes to sleep by herself. And the night-time sleeping by herself has been put on hold. She sleeps well but she can't fall asleep alone in the room yet. So, she will hang around till my maid has finished bathing and goes into the room to sleep with her. So, Ally sleeps at 8ish 9. My maid does too. Good life! We're thinking of putting the two girls together soon. Hopefully Angeline will be a good influence. That girl sleeps by herself willingly - our best e.g of effective sleep training.

So, anyways, this post breaks the moody spell. Yay! I have to confess that I am the world's worst and laziest blogger. Sometimes I blog so little I forget the password when I want to write something. Try to make up for it somehow.....

Suicide and Kids

2008-09-01T23:42:00.002+08:00

Ally came back from my in-laws place, eager to tell me about a lady who had fallen from above. When I heard, I was shocked but Ally said it was only from the first floor and the lady had actually wanted to catch the plastic bag that she had dropped and accidentally fell with it. She said the lady was ok, she only broke her legs and had to be sent to the hospital. She then said Ah Ma said she must be careful not to play near the balcony or open windows.

I didn't know the true extent of the story till my mother-in-law filled us in over the phone in the evening.

Alison saw a lady fall to her death today, right in front of her.

A middle aged lady cleaner committed suicide from one of the higher floors of my in-laws flat. My in laws and Ally were playing at the void deck area, when they saw a plastic bag drop with a thud on the floor. Exclaiming at how inconsiderate the act was, the whole family went forward to peek above at the culprit. Next thing, the lady fell to the ground right in front of them. The ambulance and police were called in.

I am not sure how much Ally saw. My mother-in-law said she immediately shielded Ally from the scene. Ally asked many questions. Apparently, when my mother in law told her that the lady wanted to catch the bag she had dropped, Ally was puzzled and asked why the lady didn't just walk down to get it. Didn't she know it was dangerous?

How do you talk about suicide to a kid, a toddler? Should you? I am not quite sure how to deal with it. For now, we are sticking to the story that my mum in law told her and that she seems to believe.We are trying not to mention the matter or give it any significance. I can't tell if she is traumatised by the matter. She has been talking about the lady who broke her legs the whole day. At night, she suddenly decided that she wanted the lights on. I got her to say her usual prayers to Jesus tonight and it's usually when she opens up. She spoke about the lady who broke her legs again, and we asked Jesus to help the lady get better.

Anyone have any advice for how to deal with the incident and my 4 year old. I'll just wait and see otherwise. She seems fine, but she did come down with a 39 degree fever tonight, though I'm sure that's not related.

To those of you who know her and are reading this, please don't bring the matter up either when you see her. Thanks.

Maldives Here I Come!

2008-08-26T22:41:00.004+08:00

Off for a short vacation with my hubby for our fifth anniversary! Can't wait!

Hide and Seek - Their way

2008-08-17T15:24:00.003+08:00

This is Alison and Angeline playing hide and seek. ....

They're hiding.

No idea who gave them the idea that as long as they can't see the seeker, they're safe. No matter that they're fully visible for all the world to see.

Children and Family - Some inspiring words

2008-08-06T22:50:00.005+08:00

Last Saturday, I had the great pleasure of listening to a talk given by the Prelate of Opus Dei- His Excellency Bishop Javier Echevarria. It was a very enlightening and inspiring talk - given straight from the heart, with the wisdom that can only be attained through a strong faith and deep relationship with God.

I thought I'd take the time to pen down what he said about children and family. This was in response to a question raised by Marjorie, who is the coordinator for the Family Enrichment Program that I am attending with Mark. She and her husband, Cyprian currently have 6 children (her youngest is 1.5) and they are expecting their seventh child. If you knew them, you would be in awe at how they manage their lives and respect them for it. She said they struggled with the decision of whether or not to have a seventh, often feeling that they have not enough time with the children (both of them work) and asked for some words of advice.

His answer
1) See the children coming to your home as a sign of God giving his love to you. Tell the Lord to protect your children and pray for all the other children of the world. Love God through your children.

2)Teach the older children to take responsibility, to take care of their siblings.

3) Always have a big smile on your face when you come back home from work. Even if you have been away, your smile and love will make your children look forward to you.

4) Don't seek comfort for its own sake. Don't use that as an excuse not to have more children.

5) Be good friends of your children so that they learn the right things, from you. Set good examples for your children. May the children drink the faith of your life.

Nice simple words of advice . I find it helps us see the bigger picture. Often, we can be caught up in our own self centered pursuits. Often, we don't even see them as self centered pursuits but necessary to our well being. Sometimes, we just need to stop and think, and consider the bigger and more important picture. I found his words inspiring.

Inspired

2008-07-19T16:26:00.002+08:00

With all this talk about babies nowadays, I am constantly inspired by this particular family with 6 children ( and perhaps even more on the way)

What inspires me is how calm the parents are, even with all these kids. And how well behaved and well adjusted their kids are. I only have two and I can already get a little too anxious sometimes about them. Both parents have full time jobs, mind you, and they still lead a balanced life.

Maybe their calmness comes from experience. Whatever, the case, it is inspiring. This family makes you see the joy of having more kids and that's a good thing.

I think some young married couples should not think too much either- about whether they have enough resources, whether they are ready to have children. It's a blessing to have kids and most couples will manage and do it well. We just have to be less self centered and also have a more open and relaxed approach, and the true joy of a family will shine through.

Just some of my thoughts...

Thinking about Primary 1

2008-07-19T16:04:00.002+08:00

Is it only in Singapore that primary one registration can be so competitive and stressful? That even if you don't want to be part of the race for the good schools, you can't help but be?

Hmmm. When Alison was born 3 years ago, Mark and I scoffed at the idea of parents volunteering and strategising for their kids to gain top priority into good schools. The Phase 1A, 2A, 2B etc still baffles me. I mean, in my time, (20 plus years back..yes, I am not that young anymore), my dear sweet mother was late in registering me, to the point that she had to beg the principal of my school to let me in, otherwise I would have to delay my primary one education to the next year. Can you imagine, being one whole year older than all my peers???!! ( although come to think of it, maybe I would have been a scholar then..and not have to compete with all the dragons in my year. hahah)

Anyhow, back to the topic at hand. Ally is turning 4 this year. If we want to get into this popular school that is near our area, we have gotta start volunteering sometime next year I think. We need to volunteer for one year before we register the child for school.This particular school only allows volunteers to be traffic wardens ( why, I have no idea.. since I would hardly be a good one!). The girls can easily get into the convent school I went to, but Mark (and he has persuaded me) is keen on this school because of its solid chinese grounding. After all, we have been so successful with our Mandarin immersion, Ally says she prefers Mandarin and I do believe, speaks it grammatically more accurately than her English.

So, somehow, next year , I might have to sign up to be a volunteer (since I am the one with the flexi time!). If I don't get it, that seals our fate and we will just go to my old school. If we do, then we should be able to get in because our new place is less than 1km from the school ( not intentional.. pure coincidence):)

I cannot believe I am thinking of this now. Well, some of my peers were thinking about this when their kids were newborns. So, I am already relatively "slack".

A Little on Angie

2008-05-10T21:17:00.005+08:00

Alison and Angie are like fire and ice- as different as can be.

One has long hair. The other- short wispy hair that frequently looks like a toupe.(the top part seems to not belong to the bottom part!)

One has small chicklet teeth. The other big bugs bunny teeth.

One is very active. The other likes to laze around.

One is gentle and mild. The other is a real samseng, who has been labelled a "chilli padi" in school.

This little samseng of Angeline has seriously evolved from her days as a quiet little baby. She has always had extremely good sleeping habits, so she is rarely in a bad mood and is always very quiet and well behaved.

Until she hit about 1.5 years and started talking more... the true Angeline has emerged.

Some people say it's the second child syndrome. Angie is very bold. She fights to get what she wants and often wins! She is more often than not bullying her elder sister, who is mild and seldom retaliates.

She is also a charmer, who will present her sweetest face and smile to the person she knows will succumb to her affections.

She still sleeps well. Pardon me for boasting about this yet again!! Perhaps she is one who naturally likes to sleep. But coupled with the great sleep routine and training, this angel just needs a few taps at night, one or two songs and she waves us off to settle down for the night. She sings a couple more songs to herself after we leave her and is usually sound asleep in 15mins tops. The true test for whether all our sleep training works will be with our third child (if we do manage to have one.)

Angie turns two at the end of the month. I can't imagine life without this spunky little thing. And of sweet sweet Alison, who has been saying she loves me forever ( in Mandarin, her new favourite language). I'm sure there are many moms out there who are feeling all warm and fuzzy thinking about their kids too. Cherish them!Happy Mother's Day!

A Little on Ally

2008-04-26T23:55:00.005+08:00

At this point in time, the three words that come to mind when I think of Alison are:

Gu-Niang She is definitely very girly, very gentle, very gu niang lor. When she goes swimming, she exclaims, " Ah ah, my hair's wet !" when anyone nearby jumps into the pool and splashes around. How more "gu niang" can you get right?

Chinese Maniac She's absolutely enthralled by the language now. She prefers Chinese songs over English. She requests that we speak to her in Mandarin frequently. Her command of the language is way better than Mark and myself at 3+. She can even manage simple sentences. As her memory is very good, she can even sing rather complicated tongue twister type Mandarin songs. We realised that she would concentrate really hard when the song is playing, silently muttering the words, then surprise us with the full version soon enough. Am rather pleased with this development and am seizing all opportunities to get her acquainted with the language. Mark and I take Mandarin tuition once every week and she sits in in the beginning, reading her own Mandarin book. We figured she became interested because she saw us learning the language, and possible also because her favourite teacher in school is her Mandarin teacher. She surprised us one day too by saying that she wants to learn Mandarin because she's Chinese!

Queen of Imagination Ally prefers imaginary stories to those told from the storybook. It's very amusing. She will close her eyes and listen as we weave up the wierdest, yet vivid stories of fairies, wizards, deep dark forests, unicorns, dragons. Or even of snakes who tickle monkey's armpits. The wierder the better, the more magic in it, the better. You know she's listening real intently too, as when you stop, she will help fill in the blanks. She can tell you her own imaginary stories too but they are usually a combination of storylines from what we've told her before.

Then and Now

2008-04-26T00:18:00.002+08:00

Here's me and my girlfriends from Victoria Junior College. It's been ages since we last met up, had to take a photo. Evie unfortunately was sick, so she's not in the photo.

(L to R) Little Joshua, Cat, May, Me and Ally and Angeline and Mawar)

Imagine, we used to look like this. this pic was taken when we were in JC.

(L to R) Me!, Cat, Mawar, Eve and May

My have we changed...

What's Up Lately?

2008-04-19T23:24:00.004+08:00

Looking at my last post is depressing. And it's been there for so long! Yes, Yes, I am hopeless at updating my blog.:(

Anyway, on to more cheery stuff! Nobody's sick. The kids are back to the chirpy selves. Alison is eating tons, a very clear sign that she's back to normal!

What's been happening since?

1) Ally is learning ballet.
She's gone for 3 lessons so far, together with her cousin Rachel. They really love it and have been tottering around on their tippie toes. Goodness knows how long they will keep at this. A friend told me ballet dancers are the worst paid, after the religious... Ha. So this is going to remain a hobby... unless she turns out to be a prodigy... no signs of that happening so far..
We're planning swimming next! Nice to keep the kids occupied and learning stuff - I ain't no creative mum and home projects never take off.. so best this way!

2) Mark and I have started attending a family educating program (http://familyes.org.sg/)It's a year long course, with reading materials, group discussions with families with similar age kids, and homework ( mainly aimed at getting us to think up action plans to inculcate good values in our kids) We are being guided by a couple who have 6 kids! (Imagine that!). So far, it's been very enlightening - hearing advice from a very dedicated couple - Marjorie and Cyprian, and entertaining - hearing stories from the other couples and being able to identify with their many bloopers when dealing with their kids. I sincerely hope we'll be able to be the best parents that we can be with Ally and Angie.

Ok, that's all I can manage for now... I'm off to sleep... will ease back into the blogging thing slowly...this is supposed to keep track of my kids' milestones but that's been left on the back burner somehow.

When it rains, it pours

2008-03-25T14:42:00.002+08:00

Ok, well life isn't all that bad. But it is a rather depressing month I must say, on all fronts.

This week, both girls are sick - fever, congested cough and runny nose. It all started with Angeline, who screams like a piglet in an abattoir whenever she takes her meds. So, as you can guess, she never quite takes the full dosage and so never gets fully well.

It's finally passed on to Ally.

The husband is overseas, so it's a bit of a horrid situation now. Everything comes to a standstill, as the week revolves around paediatric visits (usually about 2 hours each time) , nebuliser routines, medicine routines, screaming routines. Waking up in the middle of the night to feel for fevers, waking them up to do their nebulisers and then trying to get them back to sleep.

I hope all gets better fast. There are other things as well, that make me just want to write off this month and start afresh in April.

CNY 2008

2008-02-11T23:15:00.001+08:00

Some pics to remember the occasion. It is SOOOOOOO hard to get a pic of the entire family looking in the same direction together or with the appropriate expression. For now, I have to settle for what i can get, at least till the kids get older.. this is what I've got

There are some decent ones though... but I know I'll like to keep the ones above too to remember their cheekiness!All smiles here are mostly achieved through tickling the kiddos or adults making monkey faces (which explains why the kids are often looking elsewhere.

Does anyone think Angie is starting to look more like me?

Angeline Goes to School

2008-02-11T21:00:00.000+08:00

Today was Angie's first day at school. We had originally planned to send her when she turned two. However, we finally decided sending her earlier might be better for her mental development. At home, she has a tendency to just loll around, from sofa to bed to floor, just stoning out and chilling. Unlike her sister, who would potter about the house, you know, "discovering" things and learning. Angie likes to BUM around, so that's why we decided some structured play would be beneficial.

Everything went pretty well in the beginning. Angie is more outgoing than her sister, so she was fine interacting on her own as long as I was somewhere around the class. Here she is observing from a distance.

During snack time.

See how big her class is - in Alison's time it was much smaller at just 6 students... hmmm. now there are like 12. Angie is as always the smallest, just like her sis.

It went downhill though when the classes had combined playtime. There are no pictures from here on...

Silly Alison started to get clingy and jealous and started acting up. She wanted to be carried just like mei mei. Angie then started clamouring for my attention even more, as she did not want to lose out to her sister. Rachel, Alison's cousin, then started to wail too... because Rachel is SUPER attached to Cheh Cheh Alison and got upset because Ally kept disappearing out of their class to cling to me in the baby class!

So, we have 3 kids wailing, 2 clinging on to me, one clinging on to Alison. The school principal and teachers were quite horrified at the scene. Not only was the new kid screaming, the two older supposedly settled pioneer students were wailing too... AIYOH!

So guess what? I left.

I shoved Angie into her form teacher's arms and sent Ally and Rachel back to their classes. I sneaked back half an hour later to take a peek and guess what, everyone was fine! Angie had stopped crying after a few minutes after Miss Hannah reasoned with her that there was no point crying. That is according to Miss Hannah who said Angie nodded and said yes, as though she understood. Mealtime was next and Angie was so at home she even had two helpings of her fried rice.

Then, everyone took the school bus home (the highlight of Angie's day - she loves to take the bus). According to the bus teacher, Angie did not cry but her older sis Ally did. Are we getting a sense of who the main trouble maker was today? Ask her though and she will tell you she DIDN"T cry.

So, anyway, it's a wrap. I'm just dumping everyone in school tomorrow and leaving. Hopefully, everything works out and I am home free, with every morning entirely to myself. The joys of having kids reaching school going age...

Love these pics!

2008-01-01T23:45:00.000+08:00

These were taken at the National Museum for a Christmas Feature in Motherhood Dec Issue. Loved the shots so bought them from the photographer. Can't believe he managed to get these. There were about 80 over useless ones where the kids would not look at the camera, would not smile, or where Angeline was just running away. One of the shots there shows just that! Look at my anguished face. Not easy taking shots of kids or posing with kids, even if they are your own! Still, these are the few that were good! The last pic was used in the mag in the end.

Decluttering

2008-01-01T23:22:00.001+08:00

It's the new year and I tried to do a bit of decluttering today.

Then I realise that the biggest obstacle to clearing up is having:

1) A maid who wants to keep everything I throw out
This always happens. I throw some old clothes, old shoes, cosmetics, bags out and ask her to bring it down to the garbage chute. She asks if she can keep some as they are still good, and guess what, close to half the load is given a new lease of life - just now stuffed in her room- cluttering the already crowded room where my daughter also sleeps, OR stuffed in our full-to the-brim storeroom that I am trying to clear. The most dismaying moment was for my shoes - I cleared some old shoes to make way for new ones, But she decided she wanted to keep them and wear them now so they went back into the shoe closet, which she shares with us. Darn!!!

2) A husband who insists on keeping all the boring financial journals - CFA journal, Financial Digest, all the boring ARMY News Mags, Pioneer News, NUS Alumnus Journals that come by every month. He claims he wants to read them and ticked me off the last time I threw a load out. But I know he won't because issues from 8 months back are still wrapped in their plastic covers! And they are so boring you won't even want to read it in the loo. Sigh. But to keep our marriage strong, I have now arranged them in our bookshelf. Maybe next year I can throw them out.

Angie's Amazing Sleeping Habits

2007-12-31T20:39:00.000+08:00

This girl never fails to amaze me.

She has a new way of going to sleep. Ever since I started getting a bad back a few months back, I've been patting her to sleep. That was a very smooth transition.

Then, Mark told me that for the past few nights, she's progressed one step further. He didn't believe it either.

After a few taps, he would stop and say to her, " Ok, Angeline, go and sleep. Daddy will be over there/ or Daddy will be going up to sleep (meaning he'll be at the computer area which is still inside the room or on our bed which is in a loft in our bedroom.

She would get up frantically, clinging to the side of the cot. Amazingly though, she would say, in a half "manja" voice," Ok, bye bye , bye, bye," and actually wave to him!

Hahaha. I thought he was totally having me on. But tonight was my turn to put her to sleep. And when it was time to say goodbye, she did exactly the same thing!

Perhaps it's because she now understands things way better, and so realises that we are still around somewhere, when we said what we said. Hiyah, our little darling.

Oh, by the way, for the record, this Angeline can really sleep. She definitely takes after her mummy. She can sleep from 8pm at night to past 8 in the morning - we have to wake her up in the morning. Not that she doesn't take her naps ah... she takes 3 hour naps in the day and again, she has to be woken up. Her smelly bolster is her best friend.

*** We're going to try getting her to sleep by herself totally, eventually. We tried that several months back and while it worked in the beginning, she seem to develop this phobia whenever we put her down in the bed. So, we started rocking her again. Perhaps she will be ready to sleep on her own soon. Still, we're very pleased with her thus far.:)

Ally's First Concert Performance

2007-11-11T22:53:00.000+08:00

Such a proud moment for us. We always watch this on TV, where the parents watch their kid play a "tree" or a "flower" and still ooh and ahhh and watch on, filled with pride. This was our turn! Here's Ally with her classmates from Annie Apple. They're all 2- 3+ years old. It's really cute how they managed to perform the dance.

Ally's right in front with the long hair. Her teacher said she did freeze when getting on stage - you can tell in the first song she is a little nervous seeing so many people but she managed to pull it off! I am so proud of her! Her cousin Rachel was a blast - she's behind Ally with the short hair - check out her dancing!

Can't wait for next year's concert.

** Takes a while to load. Must be patient, the Q thing stays on for some time and looks like it's done but it's not. Wait for video pic to appear, then you will be able to watch the video. Thanks!

Ally's 3rd Birthday Party -Repost of Video

2007-11-11T22:51:00.000+08:00

Reposting this because somehow it did not work the last time.

It's all in the stars!

2007-10-31T00:04:00.000+08:00

We always knew Ally was like the teacher's pet. In school one day, we stumbled upon this chart, which sealed her fate lah.

Can you see her line of stickers, which is already OFF the chart. Her class teacher said the stars do not indicate the child's intelligence or anything. It is really given when a child does what the teacher asks.

I sure have one obedient child! I think this one next time sure class monitor. Strangely enough I am pleased but also a bit embarrassed.

Mark is extremely proud. He is printing the pic and pasting it for everyone to see at his workplace. That's one happy daddy!

So who do our children look like?

2007-10-30T23:44:00.000+08:00

So the final verdict......

Kinda what we figured actually. Go to www.myheritage.com to waste time like I did. Or worse, join facebook, also what I did over the past two days. Very very very waste time. how? :(

My life as an entrepreneur mom

2007-10-20T21:00:00.000+08:00

Thought I'd share some of my life with everyone - by posting excerpts of an interview done with Mama Bao Bei Magazine or Motherhood(Chinese) I'm in the November/December issue under Successful Working Moms. It's in Mandarin - err. so here's the English version. I've been meaning to post an entry about balancing work and motherhood and evrything else, but that would take me forever, so this might be a faster way. It's quite long, so just read the parts that interest you. And share your thoughts!

1. What made you decide to start a business?
What made me decide was the need to have more flexible working hours so that I could be with Alison. Also, the desire to do something that I was super passionate about and that would utilize my skills and also challenge me to greater heights. I’ve wanted to start my own business for ages actually, just that the right idea had yet to come along. I also needed something that would be a viable business in the long run. Finally, Maternity Exchange was the answer.

2. Are there benefits to being a working mom who owns her own business versus a working mother who is accountable to her employer?
The best part about running your own business is that your time is flexible. If I know that the day is going to be busy with the kids, I can schedule work to be done at night, after the kids go to sleep. My meetings with staff or suppliers are always scheduled in the afternoons, between 2 to 4 pm, which is when my two kids take their nap. If I want to spend more time with my family or if an emergency crops up and say I need to take the kids to the doctor, I almost always am able to do it, as I can simply reschedule my work activities. It is unlikely that you will be able to find such flexibility working for an employer.

Another great benefit is the control I have over my career. I’m not following someone else’s orders. I make my own decisions. When I work hard, I am also working for my own company and its growth. Since Maternity Exchange is something that I am very passionate about, it is extremely satisfying investing the time and energy into it.

3. What has been most unexpected about being a working mom?
How unpredictable your day can be! Because I do a lot of work from home as well, my work plans for the day are often just messed up when my two kids do not follow their own daily routines. For instance, when my second child Angeline was born, my best laid out “to do” list was often left totally undone if she decided not to take her naps, since my whole day would have to be spent dealing with a cranky baby. Or, when the kids fell sick, as was often the case with Alison when she first started pre school. She would bring the flu bug home every few weeks and pass it to her younger sister and eventually to the maid, my husband and me. Then all work would have to be put aside to ferry everyone to the doctor and nurse everyone back to health, including myself often enough. Thankfully, the kids are 3 and 1 now, so their routines are more settled and they fall sick less often now. Before, I was often left with a backlog of things to do whenever anyone fell sick.

4. What would have been different about your working mom experiences if your business had been at a different stage?
Maternity Exchange just turned two years old, which means it’s still in the early stages. A large part of the operational aspects are still being done by me - from tending to the Maternity Exchange outlet at Marina Square- serving customers, sourcing, inventory buying, stock taking, publicity and marketing. This means that I do spend the bulk of my time on the business. If the business were at a more mature stage, and some aspects were outsourced, I believe my time could be spent more efficiently, and I could have more quality time with my children and family.

Having said that, I still feel this is better than if I were working full time under an employer, simply because I have control over how my working mom experience is like. Everyday, I face the dilemma between whether to spend all my time growing the business faster and better and whether to take time out for my family and my own health. There is only so much a person can do and it’s ultimately the person’s own choice. I always work, keeping in mind that that family and health are the most important, and the rest falls into place. If it means the business may not grow as fast as I want, so be it.

5. What's your normal day like?
645 a.m. The kids wake up, and so do my husband and me. The younger girl Angeline sleeps in our room so once she’s up, there’s no more snoozing!
8am I send my older daughter to pre-school
930- 12noon Come home to my office and catch up on admin work for the business. This is the largest chunk of quiet time I have for the day usually,
1230 to 2pm Alison comes home from school. My time is spent on lunch, entertaining the girls and together with my maid, getting the girls to take their afternoon nap.
230- 6pm Meetings with staff, suppliers, or catching up on more business duties.
630pm-8pm On days that I do not have to be in the shop, this time is always spent with my husband and the girls – dinner, reading bedtime stories, then my husband and I will each take either Ally or Angeline and soothe them to sleep. Both kids sleep by 8, so my husband Mark and I have quiet time for ourselves after. We sometimes go for walks or have dinner out.
9-11pm is spent catching up on work if necessary.
1130pm Sleep!

6. How do you manage to balance your work and family life?
It is a constant struggle. But I find keeping in mind the broader picture that my family and my health are most important helps to get my priorities right and maintain a good family-work balance. I am a natural worrier and a workaholic. So, whenever I am consumed by work and am tempted to skip meals, work late nights, skip exercise or ignore my children when they come to me for stories or hugs, I always have to remind myself that family and health come first and that will make me slow down and balance things out.

Spending some time in the morning to plan my day well also helps a great deal, to ensure I manage my time effectively and set aside time for the family and for exercise and couple time.

7. Do you have your own personal time/space?
Very little since the two girls were born! However, I do enjoy a half hour moment of “peace and quiet” in the morning when I have my breakfast. That’s when Alison is at school and Angeline is out on a morning walk with my maid. My husband and I also either bond together or do our own personal things at night after the kids go to bed at 8. I also use the time when I exercise – either swimming or running – to think and relax.

8. Has balancing working and raising children been a struggle for you and your family all along, or has it been an evolving process over time?
It used to be a bigger struggle but it has gotten better as the kids are now slightly bigger (at least they are walking! and no longer breastfeeding!). I have also learnt, through experience, to better manage my time. When the kids were just born, and the business had just begun, I remember trying to do everything from being a good mother to being a good businesswoman. And both the aspect of caring for a newborn (including breastfeeding every 3 hours even in the middle of the night) and running a new business were totally NEW to me – I fell sick half the time, like every few weeks! I also had this idea that kids had to be fully occupied and entertained when they were awake – they could not be left alone to play by themselves. So, I was very busy and very stressed!

However, I’ve learnt to plan my day better, and am open to last minute changes in my schedule since this is part and parcel of working and raising a young family at the same time. I’ve also learnt to ask for help when I need it. Since I have excellent support in my in laws and my very reliable maid – balancing work and raising children has become much more manageable now.

9. What made you decide to start a business like Maternity Exchange?
Me spending a bomb on trendy maternity clothes while I was pregnant with Alison inspired me to get into the retail business. I found imported maternity wear from fashion forward countries like the US considerably nicer than local maternity wear in terms of the variety of fabric, prints and styles. But these were also much more expensive than the local brands, often above $100 for any piece. There was also a great lack of nice evening maternity wear for functions locally.

So, I really wanted to bring all those fantastic clothes in, but I was practical and knew that I had to find a way to make it affordable too. That’s why the rental concept made perfect sense, as pregnant moms-to be can now get to wear quality imported clothes for a fraction of the price to buy it. This also means mums to be can afford to have a wider variety of clothes to wear and the best fit and style at every stage of their pregnancy. No more wearing too big or too tight maternity clothes and what’s worse, the same boring few designs to death!

10. Have you ever thought of giving up your business for your family?
If I had to make that difficult decision one day, I would give up my business for my family because family comes first. If I had nothing left in the world to my name but my family, I would be content.

11. If there were a chance, would you reconsider the decision of becoming a working mom?
No, I love working but it must be for my own business. It keeps my mind active, keeps me feeling useful and ultimately makes me a better mum. Being a stay at home mum is tough and only certain people can take the emotional challenge that goes along with taking care of the kids full time and coping with running the household. I like the balance that I have struck – working but still having the flexibility to spend time with my kids.

12. Please share your secrets of being a successful working mom.

These are some things I do to help keep me sane!
1. Keep a diary and spend some quiet time in the morning to list down the things you need to do – both work and personal. Tick off the items as you complete them. I find this helps me to manage my time better and keeps me from feeling pulled in all directions and from forgetting things. As a mum who works from home often, my kids demand attention often and can leave a mother rather frazzled if things are left to chance and are not planned and written down!
2. Be realistic. Make a list but don’t try to do so many things when you know it is just not humanly possible. Do the best you can.
3. Sleep early. Get your rest and do fit in some time to exercise. If you fall sick, everything falls apart.
4. Make sure your kids get their rest. Young babies and toddlers should have regular naps and early bedtimes, in my opinion, so they have a strong immune system and are not cranky! Their wellbeing and structure in routine will help you keep balanced and organized too!
5. Set your priorities and keep this in mind when you start to feel like there are so many things to take care of and no time to do it. For me, family and health are first and foremost, then business. So, that helps me not to overwork and lose my balance in life.
6. Ask for help if you need – don’t try to be a supermom all the time. You need to have some rest to recharge and emerge better able to handle things.

13. What advice would you give to working moms who are aspiring entrepreneurs or entrepreneurs who are aspiring mothers?
To working moms who are aspiring entrepreneurs – Go for it! The flexibility that you will get and the personal satisfaction from seeing the fruits of your labour are very worth it! Just remember starting your own business is very challenging – be prepared to work even harder than in a normal job. If your finances are ok and your children are big enough to not need as much of your time, then take the plunge! Alternatively, you can start the business, but moderate it’s growth according to the demands of your family. Start small and steady in the beginning if that helps to give you more balance.

To entrepreneurs who are aspiring mothers – having a child is going to turn your life – work and personal - upside down but nothing can replace the joy of your newborn. Just be prepared to have to slow things down on the business end when your child is born – you can easily pick things up again when life is more settled.

It's Chinese!

2007-10-16T22:44:00.000+08:00

Ally loves her Mandarin lessons in school. The Chinese teacher Wang Lao Shi is her favourite teacher. And everyday, she sings mandarin songs the whole time.

Yesterday, Mark and I were testing her, based on the mandarin song sheets in her school file. She knew all of them, some rather complex ones even. Oh, we were so amazed and she was gleefully lapping up the attention.

I asked," wow,you know so many mandarin songs, do you know what the songs mean?"

Ally replied, " No, of course not, it's Chinese." ( in a "like duh?!" tone)

Hmmm... long way more to go....

Bits and Pieces

2007-10-12T20:23:00.000+08:00

It's been so long since I last blogged I find it impossible to catch up. My sister in law smsed me and said she looked forward to reading about Ally's birthday, my holiday etc but honestly I don't think I have the stamina to back track so much. I am quite a lazy blogger sometimes.... it's like I have all these blogging ideas running around in my mind but the minute it reaches the end of the day, I am so tired I decide to just go to bed.

So tonight, while I am quite in the mood, I think I shall just show you guys pictures of what's been happening - a bit at a time.

Ally and Rachel dressed up as fairies for Children's Day at their school. I saw a Best Dressed Award slip in Ally's school bag but then again, maybe everyone got it. Heh.

Rachel hurt her arm while dashing for the telephone. Ally wailed tons when she heard. At first we were so touched that she could feel such pain for her cousin's injury. Then she revealed she was just "scared of the bandage!"

As for Ally's 3rd birthday, here's a short clip of the day's happenings. Let's just say kids parties are not cheap - we hired Fantasy Parties to take care of the whole decor and entertainment - but it was good for how they made everything so easy. We learn a new lesson with Ally all the time and each time it is to go smaller the next time. Which is why Angie always gets the simpler do. Heh. But she seems to enjoy her own small parties just with family. Anyhow, she gets to enjoy her big sis's one too -look at her (in blue spaghetti strap dress) having a whale of a time!

Woo Hoo!! Ah Boo Chuck is Back!!

2007-10-04T13:42:00.000+08:00

Finally! I've been missing for SOOOOOOOOOOO long because I got locked out of my blog when the email I used to sign up became defunct! It's been a month of to-ing and fro-ing with Google. I almost gave up and was prepared to set up an entirely new blog.

Well, looks like I won't have to do that now. So, here's to more posts!

So many things have happened.... on the work, shop and family front. Ally's 3 year birthday, Angie speaking lots more and on the work front - I have encountered one of the most horrifying acts of irresponsibility from a new staff... I don't even feel like going into details as I have moved on and will find a new staff.

Anyway, i am currently in the US on a buying trip - have found lots of new products for the store and am thrilled! Next few days will be relaxation time as Mark and I drive from LA to Santa Barbara to San Francisco. Shopping!!! is great here - lot of unique stores!!! Am so happy I have not seen any Zara or Mango. We've been hunting down lots of unique cult boutiques. Stocked up on designer jeans - my favourite!

Ok, later!

Look who loves durian!

2007-07-08T23:02:00.001+08:00

Angie's big sister Ally, however, does not like it at all. Are such preferences fixed from young? Oh well, at least she does not vomit from the smell of it. (Like our maid Delia) Poor Lee family.. we have to go out of the house to eat it or on her off day. And we cannot save some for later because the smell in the fridge would kill her.

Sleeping By Herself

2007-07-05T20:26:00.000+08:00

I really don't mean to brag here but I have to record this down for my future reference. For the past few days, Angie has truely been sleeping on her own.

After a bottle of milk, I simply put her down in the cot right away, no rocking at all. I then give her a kiss goodnight and just walk away. And you know what, she doesn't even cry, just smiles at me and turns over to hug her bolster. It takes about 20 mins for her to go to sleep soundly this way. The first few minutes I will hear her singing and babbling to herself, and sometimes she thumps her leg on the bed. But soon after, there is silence and you know she has successfully soothed her little self to sleep.

I am seriously impressed if I may say so myself. Many of Angie's sleep milestones have been quite accidental actually. I've been finding her really heavy, so I've been putting her down before she is sound asleep. At first, it was after substantial rocking so she was laid down semi sleepy. I realised that she did not protest when I left her like that. Lately, she herself has been squirming in our arms as though she is not comfortable and started leaning towards the cot, as if signalling that she wants to be put down. So,I decided it might be safe to just lay her on the bed and pat her to sleep. (Mark still does that) But for some reason, she does not like my patting , So for the past 2 days, I have just laid her down in the cot, wide eyed! and just left her to go to sleep by herself. And she does not protest at all.

Actually in all aspects, Angie is a dream baby. I am beginning to suspect it might have something to do with the hypnobirthing that I did before, during and after Angie's birth. She is super calm, or as my friend Karen puts it, it's like she's on "grass"- always happy and so calm. My doula Ginny said many of her clients have reported similar tales, although of course every baby is different. I might just have a real good baby on my hands. But I think the hypnobirthing made her even better then.

Still, back to the sleep habits. We seriously stuck to her regular nap and bedtime routine from birth and I think that has definitely played a big part.

Cutie Pie Angie walks steadily @ 13 months!

2007-06-28T23:34:00.000+08:00

She walks everywhere now.. but is usually more steady when she holds objects in her hand - better balance I guess.

Jealous Ally or Naughty Ally?

2007-06-28T23:08:00.000+08:00

From about three days ago, Ally has not been keen on going to school. She kicks up a fuss everytime we leave the house and bawls her eyes out at the school entrance. Considering that she has been real good about it for a year and a half, I found it odd.

Yesterday, she kicked up the same fuss again and begged not to go to school. My mother in law mentioned that the teachers said she might be jealous of her mei mei Angie. So, I decided to ask her teachers.

Amidst a wailing Ally, the school principal and her Annie Apple form teacher all told me that Ally had been pretty quiet the past few days, not her usual self. She would also tear when she spoke. And this is what got to me. The teacher said Ally said that she doesn't want to come to school because she wants to be with Mummy. "Mummy always goes home to Mei Mei." The teacher told her that Mummy went to work, but Ally said, " No, she is at home with Mei Mei everyday!" Which is true lah, since I work from home most of the time.

I felt sorry for Ally and realised that she must really be feeling jealous all of a sudden. When Mei Mei was still an infant, she really wasn't much of a threat I guess, being just the "baby". But Angie has really grown into this lovely little charm of a baby who knows how to melt people's hearts just with her smile, her tendencies to lie and snuggle on your shoulder, her outstretched arms when you call her, her funny little babbles. Mark and I, and also everyone else have certainly started paying more attention to Angie.. She's so cute! Every morning, Mark carries Angie out from our room where her cot in, smothering her with kisses. It was really no surprise that Ally would be feeling the heat.

Make no mistake. Ally still gets the bulk of all the attention and is seriously not short of any loving. But I got a bit worried when I heard the teacher's words and decided to have some alone time with her yesterday. I took her out to MacDonalds for breakfast , where she spent one hour slowly relishing her pancakes and milk - long after I had finished my meal and seemingly stalling for time. All the while chattering happily away. We even went for a walk by the beach. Finally , two hours later, I brought her back to school where her form teacher managed to get her to let me go.

Today, she made a fuss again. But, when she thought I was out of sight, I overheard her secretly telling Rachel, " Rachel, you must cry, you be naughty, then your Mummy will take you to MacDonalds ok?!

Ha! She went right back to school today.

Anyone has any ideas what's going on with her?

More words , more milestones

2007-06-21T23:27:00.001+08:00

More words from the mouth of Angie at 12 and a 1/2 months:

Cheh (for cheh cheh Ally)
wa tat (what's that?)
dare (there)
ma ma ma (for milk and mummy)

She can also

walk about 10 steps before crawling
wave bye bye and hi ( two different types of waves- "bye bye" flabs up and down, "hi" goes from side to side)
make a pretty face (hands cupping face like a flower)
flying kiss
sayang others (gentle stroking)
show her four teeth when asked

As for Ally:

She is almost fully potty trained! We're only left with the nightime diapers now. After a long hiatus from her first pee and poo in the potty, she has finally come round to it. We bought her a seat to put on the big toilet bowl so she can sit there and flush her shit away before she sees it (the kid potty doesn't flush) That helped her to poo in the potty. And the pre-school teachers helped too - so things moved along faster. This girl needs lots of praise. As her principal says, you praise her she will do anything.

She has rather good art skills.With her recent progress report, her teacher of Annie Apple Class said that she was one of the few who could actually draw a semblance of man with arms, legs, eyes, nose, mouth and hair. Inate talent or a good kickstart from the grandma (my mum inlaw who is an artist). Ha, we shall see.

She is also a teacher's pet (my primary school friends will definitely say "learn from the mother"). Her teachers say she is such a joy to have in the class. When they ask the class to do something, she will always do it the fastest and say to the teacher, " Look Ms Eve, I do XX already!" The teacher thought it was so good but in my heart, I was thinking, " oh dear, so irritating..." Ha, she will learn the hard way to tone down her "goodliness" (just like I did, :))

More than three?

2007-06-21T22:57:00.000+08:00

I met a really nice customer in the shop the other day. She is expecting her 5th child at 44. I was inspired and told her so since it is such a rare sight these days. But she made it look really desirable!

Her first four kids are all girls, the oldest 18 followed by 16, 12, 10 and 8. They were all in the shop that day, cheering her on and giving her feedback as she tried on clothes - like "oh mummy, that's really nice on you..." So close, so nice, all so well behaved too, with the closer age gaps clicking together and all taking care of the youngest. There is economies of scale.

This lady also reminded me a lot of my late mother - with her calm cheerful and warm demeanor and her penchant for looking pretty and trendy - she picked up a fushia pink and brown dress and said, " I like this, this colour is trendy now ah girls" My mum too always liked to be dressed well and with the times.

Anyway, resemblance aside, her family actually sparked a renewed interest in having more than 2. Not like her of course, so maybe at most 4. Hahah, now as I write this, I suddenly think I am mad. Having four would defintely blow all my chances of a nice toned tummy.

But then I stumble upon a blog that leads me to more blogs of these mums with numerous kids - not 3 ah, more like 7, 10, YES in THIS DAY and AGE. Some kind of sign? Anyway, reading their blogs certainly brings an entirely new perspective to the comfortable two kids we are so used to. Some parts are a little too "godly" for many I think, but many entries are really insightful as they talk about how to feed their army of kids, how to put everyone to sleep, how to go on holiday. I mean these women are serious multi taskers ( mind you, I don't sniff a maid in their household anywhere) and you really wonder how they do it. So, they give inspiration and certainly make our little parenting woes seem like a mountain out of a molehill.

They did say - the first two take up the most time and energy though- after that they have lots of babysitters in the form of the older siblings.

So, here's a list of some of the blogs - read and be tickled (esp when some people actually offer them contacts for vasectomies) , be amazed and get tips.

In the trenches of motherhood
Amy's humble musings
Raising godly tomatoes

Filipino Style

2007-06-04T22:57:00.000+08:00

Clothes are a tricky thing to give to people. It's very personal. For kids, it is less difficult but still tricky. I am pretty particular about what I like my kids to be dressed in. It has to suit their skin tone, and not be tacky, or cheapo looking or cheena looking! And I have my own rules for that.

Days that you see the kids dressed "out of sorts" in unmatching clothes or sloppy outfits, I took an off day and let them dress themselves in their favourite colour, or somebody else dressed them. Two of those times occurred with this (I was sick) - look how happy my maid is at her creations:

and this.

Both outfits were bought by my maid Delia. She's very sensitive so there was no way I could show any sign of distaste or give the clothes away like you can with someone you hardly see. The leopard tankini actually turned out "not so bad" on Ally - probably her tanned skin helped. Our jaws dropped when we first saw the seductive piece of a swimsuit and we were wondering how how how...

* No offence to anyone if you dress your kids this way... personal taste.:)

Moth eater

2007-06-04T22:49:00.000+08:00

Angie ate a moth today. One minute it was flying around her, the next she caught it and shoved it into her mouth. By the time we realised, black juice was dripping down the sides of her mouth. Yeeeech.

Luckily we managed to pull out a substantial amount of the moth. And now Angie has learnt that they do not taste good. Her face distorted when she bit into it.

Anyway, I'm left wondering how quick her hands are. Isn't it rare for babies to be able to catch flying insects?!

I'm also now real worried about what other things she must have put into her mouth when we are not looking... this one requires an eagle eye man. Her sis Ally hardly put anything in her mouth and liked to sit in one spot. Angie...exact opposite.

Angie's First Word

2007-06-02T13:02:00.000+08:00

It's...........'THROW" ( pronouced as "TOW")

This one is a definite, because she says it everytime she throws something -- also her favourite activity.

Yay, she speaks!

Angeline's 1 Year Party

2007-05-31T23:01:00.000+08:00

We had a nice small do at our apartment and it was really nice. My friends will know we normally do things on quite a large scale. Strangely enough, the biggest do is for the one month party. )

Anyway, we decided to take things small this time, and invited just direct family members, the godparents of Ally and Angeline, my grandma and sis, my best friend and boyfriend and the three maids Only five kids were around: Angie, Ally, Rachel, Alex and Reubens. Nice and cosy, not too bewildering for Angie who really enjoyed herself! No one was really playing with her - Ally, Alex and Rachel are much older.. but she was perfectly happy hanging around them.

And learning from our mistakes, we catered this time.. don't ask us why we chose to run around buying food each time we held a party previous times. Anyway, Purple Sage gave us a nice spread (err. no pictures though, forgot to take) And we finally got to use our terrace for a good purpose other than hanging clothes out to dry.

We've also learnt to buy cheaper nice to eat cakes rather than expensive good looking cakes that are not so nice to eat. We've tried Polar for Ally so this time, the Piglet Mango Mousse Cake was from Sweets Secrets. Not bad and yummy too.

Angie amazed all by clapping her hands and smiling when the birthday song was sang to her.. she wasn't at all afraid of all the eyes on her.

Here's the three amigos (Rachel, Alex and Ally) eyeing the cake.

and tucking in. Look at these two - for some reason, Alex and Rachel click better - both gung ho and super active. Ally is more cautious.

Small and Simple is good. We'll be having more of those.

Oh... side note though. We're not going to tell any of the kids about upcoming parties till the moment itself. Ally totally refused to nap, being so excited, she was a total crank during the party. Rachel apparently skipped her nap too, but she's better at going without sleep.

Angeline - A Year Gone By - The Mum's Perspective

2007-05-29T21:46:00.000+08:00

Angie will be turning one tomorrow. How time flies! From that little bundle who torpedoed out from between my legs a year ago to the big bundle she is now. My arms cry for help when I rock her to sleep at night! ( But they are at their most toned thanks to her! Ha)

Anyway, in her mummy's eyes ( because there is supposed to be one by daddy - he promised) this is what she will always be remembered for by me:

1. The uber calm one - Always happy, rarely fretful Can any baby be calmer than this gal? She's so serene, right from time she was born. Could it be the hypnobirthing.. hmmm. maybe. Even as she grows older, she rarely cries for long. Maybe just yelps for attention when we walk away but otherwise, she is easily appeased! Chief reason why the "cry it out" method was so easy with her. She cried for just a few minutes the first time and promptly went to sleep! Mark thinks she's probably like him - happy go lucky. You see, Ally is like me, the perpetual worrier.

2. The silent creature So so different from Ally, the yabber. At one year, Angie has no distinct known word. I thought I heard her say "bye" once and "ma" but then when desperate, you will make anything out of nothing. She is babbling nonsense now though... so that's hopeful

3. The active monkey, the future national ball player What she lacks in the verbal area, she amply makes up for in the physical aspect. Ok, she's only taken 2 walking steps so far but this gal crawls like a professional crawler ( if there is such a thing), climbs onto chairs without any assistance - she just hurls her 9 kg self and scrambles up - she will find the army wall thing a breeze. Oh, and she can really throw a ball. As in she can aim at you and hurl the ball right at you with good motion and direction. Most kids her age or older throw and it goes upwards, behind, lands in the same spot. Not hers. Her activeness has worked for her and against her- her grandparents have never again suggested taking her back to their place after the first time left them with major backaches!

4. The sleeping child Ally was the first kid we successfully brought back to good sleepin habits. Angie is the confirmation that the methods work. She slept through the night at six and a half months - 730 pm to 730 am. And she doesn't cry when she wakes up - she will play quietly after giving out a short "ahh" to signal she has awoken.

Check out her wet head

5. Sweaty head Her head is always wet and sweaty, even with the little hair that she has. I think this one must keep short hair.

6. The leg thumper What else to say. She likes to thump her leg. You know how some people shake their legs to calm themselves. She thumps her leg. We know when she's awake in the morning when we hear the thump on the bed. Strange habit, though not as strange as this other girl who has to do situps to fall asleep. She's an adult now and still does it!

7. The one birthed naturallyMany years down the road, I will probably be telling Angie how she was the first one to be birthed naturally by me. Yah, I will probably brag about the fact that I did not use epidural, and delight in watching her squirm uneasily or gape in amazement. Yes, Angie will always be a reminder of how I achieved a wonderful birth.

Angie's Signature look - startled, eyes wide open

So, yes, my little angel turns one tomorrow. Life has changed even more so since our first kid. Looking back, one kid is easy peasy. Two, though allowing some economies of scale, is quite a new journey. It's been tough and hair-raising when both kids and myself fall sick, when the kids decide to nap at different times and when one wakes the other kid that you spent so long soothing to sleep. It is no wonder that at this one year mark - I am not asking to make another like I was when Ally turned one. :) Yes, I am giving myself more time to get my stomach back in shape ( ahhh.. that calls for another post), get a bigger place and oh yes, to just enjoy my first two kids for now.

The Eating Pooper

2007-05-15T20:22:00.000+08:00

That's Alison. She has a habit of eating and pooing at the same time. Nasty habit and whenever I see it, I will tell her she is disgusting and she will give me "a blur, what!? nothing wrong what" look.

So, it's always one hand feeding herself in a half squat position at the dining table. We used to call her the grasshopper , since she used to do this when she was under one year old too. She would eat and poo would come out at the same time. Input, output.

Let's hope she outgrows this. I'm making sure she remembers this for life, when I give her wedding speech. Hahha.

Some pics

2007-05-11T22:41:00.000+08:00

Reubens is baptised

Angie and Gong Gong

The two cousins Rachel and Ally

Rushed to Hospital

2007-05-02T20:03:00.000+08:00

As if the day cannot get any worse, my maid collapsed today and lay motionless on the floor, complaining of chest pains. She also couldn't move.

I was just about to step out to get some work done, thank goodness I didn't because both kids were frantic when she fell.We thought she was having a heart attack or stroke, judging from her symptoms.

I called the ambulance and she was rushed to SGH. the ECG , blood tests and chest X rays revealed nothing, although her blood pressure was rather high on the way to the hospital.

Final prognosis: Stress.

Your read my earlier post. I ranted. I think that affected her. I forgot how sensitive she is.I never knew it would affect her to the extent that she would collapse.

I will speak to her tomorrow. From her friend maids, they say she has been having problems with her family too and she is concerned that we are not renewing her contract which is due soon. Mark and I were definitely going to , we just havent got round to speaking to her about it yet with the whole family sick! This morning, she had a big row with her hubby. It all came together and bang, she couldn't take it.

I am very sorry for having tipped her over. I will be mindful not to blow my top unneccessarily. But you know, I just HAD to today or I would explode in my head with my frustration. Those of you who know me, know I rarely, if NEVER flare up. This was one of my rare days and this had to happen.

Anyway, I will be speaking to her tomorrow to reassure her and just ask about her. Caught up in everyday life of business and family, I realise I don't know much about her - it's time to do that, if not long overdue.

Sigh, what a day, what a week.

Angry and Frustrated

2007-05-02T12:01:00.000+08:00

Angry Angry Angry. I've just blown my top off at everyone around me except the kids. And now I have to blog to vent my frustration.

I just spent 3 hours at the doctor so my maid could get her second round of antibitiotics because her cough of 2 weeks is just not getting any better. This despite taking loads of vitamin c, echinicea, afternoon naps and rest when she needs.

On Tuesday, we were at KInder Clinic twice.Alison was running a high fever and we called the doctor to check that they were open. We rushed down according to their instructions and when we reached, they said the doctor had left for an emergency. Of course, that can't be helped but we were sooooooooo furstrated. Ally needed to rest not be subject to travelling back and forth.
What made us more angry was that this is not the first time we have had to deal with missing doctors and closed clinics even though we specifically called for an appointment. I am looking for another reliable PD in the east, please give your suggestions.

Anyway,some more to come. Angie has been sick for the past 2 weeks, with a cough that occurred every few seconds. Can you imagine a poor baby coughing so much! For her doctor visit, we were there for three bloody hours!!!!! Also Kinder at Parkway this time. In that same week, I brought her to the doc three times!!

I am so angry and frustrated that everyone keeps falling sick, despite all our best efforts to keep them well. I am frustrated at all the time lost at the doctors and then at home feeding them medicines, waking up at night to check on them. I am frustrated when people send their sick kids to school ( even if it is just a little cough that doesn't seem to go away) That cough spreads to an otherwise well child and the whole family suffers again, MIND YOU!! Be considerate.

I am so behind in my shop work I just want to scream.... Being at work at home mum with flexible time, guess who all the duties of the household fall onto because well I can take my own leave, I'm the boss. I can take care of everybody. BAHHHH.

I'm still fuming after this post. I am a mother so I should shoulder all of this. But it just never ends. I will seriously scream my head off at the next person who falls sick.... probably myself.

Clever Quotes from Ally

2007-04-22T12:14:00.000+08:00

This is what comes out of her clever mouth at 2 years 8 months:

"Mummy, you not adult?!"

I always use the excuse that we must wait for Daddy to come home and put the battery in the toy or fix the VCD player whenever I don't want her to play with something or when I'm just too lazy or when I really don't know how to fix something ( and only and always only daddy can fix it.. my in laws are equal tech idiots). The excuse that only adults can eat chilli or do something is always always used. So, that's what she said one day in a exasperated tone when I AGAIN said we must wait for daddy to come home.

Ally: Auntie Delia, are you angry with me?
Auntie: No?
Ally: Then SMILE!

Mummy: Ally, don't burp. It's very rude!
Ally: But I'm so full!

" Don't say ya. Say Yes. Ya is for coconut.
This is said to anyone who dares to say "ya" in front of her, including little cousin Rachel who is constantly
reprimanded by Miss Prim and Proper

Ally: Eh, Mummy ... how come you got no more nan nan"
(Said one day while lying down on my chest.)
Mummy: Because I am lying down so everything is flatter but it is still there."
Another day when asking her again
Mummy: So how come mummy has no more nan nan?
Ally : Because she is sleeping.

Having Children

2007-04-07T21:51:00.000+08:00

Becoming a mother has been the one thing that has made my life whole and complete. Mark and I have said that we would like to have three children. One might be lonely for the first child, Two is alright, Three is just nice without being too much to handle. It would make a nice rowdy and fun-loving little bunch.

Reading Jesus Urtega's book and the section on having children got me thinking again. This quote stood out:

"Do not despise the great treasure the Lord is willing to place in your hands. Blessed are those fathers and mothers who have many children, for they are the gifts that God bestows on Christian families." - Jesus Urteaga, in his book, "God and Children.

Would I be able to open myself to having even more than three children?

I know that the Catholic Faith advocates that. Every child is a gift from God, and good Catholics should be open to new life and receive with joy any child, and as many children that God bestows on their family. The method of natural family planning practised by Catholics is advocated more to space out the timing of the births(and not to limit the number of children). The nature of how this method is carried out also encourages this philosophy of being receptive to any new child that God may give, and to also nurture a husband's and wife's respect for the sanctity of each other's bodies and an awareness of the significance behind the act of making love. It also strengthens the husband's sense of fidelity to his wife since both would have to have a period of abstinence in the period that the wife is "fertile" should they not wish to conceive at that period in time. Both parties will learn how to practise self control and inherent in this is a nurturing of the couple's fidelity to each other and the ability to resist outside temptation.

This is something Mark and I strive very hard to practise. However, I now start to wonder if after I have my third child, how open will I be to more children? I'm not sure that my heart won't sink a little should the pregnancy kit turn positive for the fourth child for instance. Don't get me wrong, we will definitely welcome the child with open arms but would I be able to be as jubilant as when I discover the first three (the ones we have planned) A big nagging thought behind all this is if I would even allow myself to get pregnant after the third child and open myself to accept whatever God has planned for me.

Of course, hey, maybe I am meant to have three. All's well that ends well. But I just thought I'd share these thoughts that I have at this point in my life.

I know there might be people who can't even see the issue here and probably are already bawking at the idea that I even want to have three kids, one too many in today's society. Some might even frown and say I am being all holy moly and that the idea of having many children is just not "realistic." Gosh, there's always the running joke that people who get pregnant on their honeymoon are probably Catholics, and it's probably because natural family planning didn't work.

Indeed,today's secular world and material concerns have given rise to many strong forces opposing one's desire to have many children. I know many Catholics who give in and use contraception even though that is a sin. Fulfiling God's directive to go forth and multiply probably does not sit well with many many people. Think about all those who would say "women are not meant to be baby making machines you know!"

Still, I try my best to be as open as possible but it is hard. I admit that I want three kids only because that in my assessment, is a good number to have without being too much of a drain on our physical and financial resources, and therefore not affect our quality of life and the personal things I want to do in life.

There will be plenty of opinions on this matter and this post is about mine as I journey on in my life and try to be a good Catholic. To be honest, I am even a little embarrassed writing this post as I know many may be surprised at how I really feel, and might scoff at how holy moly it all is. Still, something inside told me I should write this, albeit not very eloquently and knowledgeably at this point. I only hope it strikes a chord among many who choose not to have kids at all or choose to limit the number of kids for purely self centered reasons. I hope it will allow them to rethink their decision. Having children is not about simply perpetuating yourself, there is a higher purpose. For the non religious, I'd like to share that having children will make you less self centered and a better person as you strive to be a role model for them. That alone is a marvellous benefit.

Ok, I shall end this post here and hopefully as I grow in my faith, my ideals will become clearer and my convictions stronger. Happy Easter to everyone!

BANG!

2007-03-29T13:53:00.000+08:00

Yesterday, I thought I was going to die.

An Indian guy driving a Mercedes smashed head on into the right side of my car. I had the right of way on the main lane and he was turning right. It was a crowded morning at 845 am and this guy did not even stop to look for traffic before turning. I was right in front of hm and he still turned!!

I tell you, as I caught sight of this white car coming staright at me from the corner of my eye, I froze and thought this was it. I can't get out of the way in time. Ally, Rachel and Susan were in the backseat, eyes wide open!!

Bang! There was a loud crash and crushing sound of metal and my car was pushed to the side of the road.

Amazingly! Miraculously! Nobody was injured! I could not be more thankful when I turned around after the crash only to see three shocked faces behind, and Alison starting to tear.

The Indian guy was very distraught and apologised profusely, saying he was in a rush and did not see. I merely said to him, " My children were in there, why didn't you look where you were going!" and left it as that since he was all sorry. I would probably have killed him if anyone was hurt.

The car is badly dented on the driver's side - we need to change the two doors, the rear wheel and some internal structure linking the doors.

According to Mark, it's lucky that I I was driving my dad's BMW which is solid and steady. If it were a Japanese car, we would most prob be injured.

Scary - This was totally unpredictable.

Stay at Home Mums

2007-03-14T21:09:00.000+08:00

Yesterday, Mark's colleague and his wife came over to visit, with their 9 month old son. His wife is a recent stay at home mum and we got to talking about getting help for her own sanity. Listening to her reminded me of the seven months I had taking care of Alison on my own, with no maid. And totally understanding that it ain't easy man!

This is a job only for certain types of very strong people! Like Erin said, when her son napped for his typical half hour, she always has to think real hard what she wants to do - eat or bathe, because after he wakes up, there is going to be no time to do anything else till Dad gets back at 730pm. It's not so much that a lot of productive work has to be done, much of the time is spent sitting by the kid's side playing games ( by the way it is very hard to entertain young babies for hours on end, I get bored!)or watching him crawl around. You can't really do much on your own because he'll wail if you leave him in the playpen or even so much as turn your back to him.

So, because the kid refuses to be cooped up in a safe area, and will crawl around and get himself into trouble, all of your own chores have to be done in extra quick time. Forget about cooking (instant noodles will do), and doing anything else. I remember many days when Mark came home at 7pm and I had not even showered the whole day. But even more difficult was having to wake up at 630 am everyday- Ally is an early bird and tend to her feeding, bathing, nap and play needs. I have only become a "fake" early bird rising at 7am everyday since I became a mom. Actually, I reverted back to my 10am days till Angie came along and Mark said in no uncertain terms that I could no longer do that if I wanted to juggle babies, myself and my business.

Anyway, I'm sure things get better after the stay at home mum gets the hang of things. Sometimes, you just have to go with the flow, and not think so much about how "unproductive" time seems to be. It's all a matter of perception since who is to say that time spent with your child is unproductive?! Hmm, although I can understand when time drones on and you've not really engaged your child in productive play because you're too damn tired!

So now I am a work at home mum, which brings along with it a whole new set of challenges( will write about my experience another time) And this has been a bit of a rambling post which doesn't seem to end nicely ( Ha) but just wanted to share my thoughts so that the stay at home mum is better understood.

Comparing Hair

2007-03-08T17:45:00.000+08:00

Angie at 9 months, with her little mane

Ally at 6 months, but with a wildly growing mane

Finding space for the carseats

2007-03-06T23:31:00.000+08:00

It's illegal but Angie has been sitting in our laps everytime we drive the whole family out. She just ducks everytime we see the cops.

I think the goverment didn't think about this issue when they decided to encourage people to have more kids and still make it a law to have all toddlers in carseats.

No doubt the law is for safety reasons, but it really makes it a bother for parents with more than one young kid at a time. For one, the carseats for infants and toddlers are so bloody big, having two of them in our decent size sedan car would leave one very miserable person stuck in the centre, if she can even fit in.

Ally's humongous carseat. Angie's is even bigger and is rear facing somemore.

Two, most people don't have those big MPVS, SUVS, PMVS,,, or whatever, and many don't want those type of vehicles. Small little me looks like a idiot driving those monster vehicles.

My brother who has 21/2 year old Rachel and 3 month old Reubens, tried strapping Rachel's car seat in the front passenger seat and the little brother's one at back. It worked out fine till Rachel kicked the gear one day ( thankfully while the car was stationary) but this was enough for the parents to decide to think of another arrangement for the car seats. Chances of a young toddler kicking her legs in happiness or frustration are extremely high and what would happen if the gear was kicked when the car is moving!

Anyway, unless someone has a better idea, we are caving in and will be getting the Mazda 5 MPV. It can seat 6 people and has 3 rows and sliding doors (like a van!) Not exactly the prettiest or smoothest car but it will serve our purposes till the kids are grown up - or maybe we will need it should there be a brood of kids. Ha. As for me, I will just have to learn how to look bigger and practise my parking - the monster vehicle ( not as bad as some others I've seen) seems very difficult to park.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away..

2007-03-04T22:22:00.000+08:00

In my young household, it seems to take much more than that! Thankfully, it's been a good month, with nobody falling sick! (*touch wood*)

One thing I definitely was not prepared for when raising a family is falling ill so often. Prior to Chinese New Year, the Lee Family ( maid included) have been battling everything from the Norovirus stomach flu, to chronic coughs to the flu. Our doctor bills for the past six months have crossed the thousand dollar mark. It's mainly the paediatrician's bills which come up to 200-300 dollars each time for both kids. They're always put on the "NEBULISER" - god I am so sick of that machine., and all the medicine that comes along with it. Here's a picture of it- parents of young kids, you'll be seeing lots of it when young kids get cough. They breathe in a mist of medicine and it frees up the phelgm in their lungs.

Angie hates it!

Ally likes it - she likes eating medicine too - might be cough mixture addict

Anyway, the main culprit is Ally. Since she started playschool, she's always bringing back the cough or cold. Because she sleeps in the same room as the maid, the maid gets it soon after. This is followed by Angeline, then me , then finally Mark. Once "last man standing" Mark gets well after the whole 3 week episode, guess who comes back again with something else. Even when her cousin Rachel ( who goes to the same school) falls sick, everyone gets it eventually. We call Ally and Rachel the two ebola (virus)monkeys. When they are sick, both the Lee and Ng ( My brother's) family will be ill.

Honestly, before evryhing stabalised, Mark and I were at our wits end. He even wanted to take her out of school. We were pissed off at the school too for letting sick kids go to school and I even told the teacher to please please monitor and send sick kids home. She said they have a very strict policy but sometimes the parents really have no one to take care of the kids. And what's more, there's always a grey area over whether kids are really sick - they seem fine but have a runny nose and cough. Sometimes, i can understand too - When otherwise well Ally's cough refuses to go away for a week, I have no choice but to send her back to school because all my own wrk is being put on hold to entertain her.. Ally is also so prone to coughs because of her inclination to "junior asthma" so sometimes I give up and send her back since otherwise she'd be at home all the time.

So, anyway, our 1 month of total good health could stem from getting the kids to eat vitamin C and colstrum tablets everyday ( we crush it into Angie's milk, Ally sucks hers), Redoxon Vit C for the adults daily, Echinicea tablets for the adults when anyone in the household seems to be coming down with anything.

For me, I've found twice weekly exercise and sleeping early helps too. Honestly, I've never truely appreciated the importance of exercising for health instead of vanity till I became a mother. It's just awful when I fall sick - the whole family goes awry and I feel terrible , hate to be a weakling. Now, at least I've got a maid, the last time when I fell sick, I still cared for Ally the whole day by myself - waking up in the middle of the night to breastfeed even since we were so adamant against bottles then. NOT funny at all, it's an awful feeling. So, you bet I'm gonna keep myself super well for the family. If anyone has any other tips, please share them here too.

Photos Photos Photos!!

2007-02-23T23:49:00.000+08:00

Like my blog's new look? Decided to go dark this time. Blogspot doesn't have much options though. Anyway, here are some pictures of Ally and Angie over the CNY period.

My beautiful angel

The "Pumpkin Patch" kids- what are the odds of all buying clothes from the same store?!

Love her yummy arms

And some photos I love of Ally:

She always knows she has to cover her "nonok"

Little Gap Girl - simplicity at its best

No more breast milk

2007-02-11T22:00:00.000+08:00

I've weaned Angeline off breast milk errr, unintentionally actually. You see, two days before I left for Hong Kong, I was sick with fever and skipped one or two pumping sessions. And then once I was in Hong Kong, I discovered that I had brought the pump, extra batteries, the power plug, the funnels but I forgot the TUBES!

Desperate, I hand squeezed my slightly full breast. Amazingly, I even managed a let down. Told Mark who said there was no way we were going to drive out to the city from Disneyland to find the tubes ( we don't even know where we can find the medela spare parts in Hong Kong)

So we decided to just let the milk dry up. The few days of being sick and the missed pumping sessions made the process fairly painless. I hand expressed only when I felt a lump building up. A few days of slightly full breasts and then no more.

Angie doesn't really know since we've been mixing the breastmilk with her formula for the past few months. She no longer drinks direct from the breast. So, well, that's it. Angie was on breastmilk for 8 and a 1/2 months.

I feel really free now.. no more rushing home to pump. No more pumping when I'm dead tired and you know what, I can go back to wearing my wired bras - although I simply cannot get used to them now after months of wearing super comfy lycra band ones. But I do feel a little guilty - since Angie got less than Ally. Hmm. Anyway, I shan't fret anymore. Not bad already lah.

Hong Kong Disneyland!!

2007-02-10T21:46:00.000+08:00

Hi! We've been away at Hong Kong Disneyland. Spent two short days there, just before Mark's business conference in Central Hong Kong itself. Not a bad break at all, even if unlucky me was down with a bad fever on my way there and still nursing a cold and cough at Disneyland itself. Still, I was determined to go and I'm glad we did. Alison had a rollicking good time!No where is there such attention given to kids- she even has her own tiny bathrobe in the Disneyland hotel!

She was positively estactic in Disneyland, humming her nursery rhymes to herself from morning to night. She insisted on taking a picture with the Chipmunks, even though we had to queue about 20mins for it.

We also took a ride in the Winnie the Pooh Hunnie Pot. Err, as you can see from the pictures, she is a little scared. Hahah, I guess we'll take that one again when she's older. Anyway, my anguished face behind( if you can tell as it seems to be concealed behind a smile) is me trying to control a very bad tummyache - yup, I dashed out to the loo once the ride was over. I seriously thought I was going to poo in the hunnie pot. The last time I did that was in Primary One in Parkway Funland... No I did not want to do that again!

Anyway, thank God we brought the stroller - a spanking new Quinny One. She loved it and it saved us from breaking our backs carrying her. She's in this " I don't want to walk, carry carry" phase now.

Thank God too for the abundance of Chinese Food available in Hong Kong. Alison is a very Chinese Girl who must have her noodles and soup. So, there was no problem filling her tummy here.

We even managed to squeeze in her afternoon nap - scooting back to the hotel room at about 130pm for her 2 hour nap (which I needed to) and dashing back to Disneyland at 430. Err, we have no pictures of the parade ( ahah) because Ally never woke up in time. Well, at least we had a happy rested child who behaved herself all the way.

Night time was spent watching the fireworks from our hotel room window which faced the disneyland park. It was a great time.

That first trip to Auntie Barber

2007-01-19T23:55:00.000+08:00

After two and a half years of cutting Ally's hair ourselves, Mark and I decided to make a trip down to the kiddy barber , "Junior League" at Parkway Parade. Just to see if they could do any better.

Ally was also ready now, having been taught the Mister Barber jingle .. You know

Mister Barber cut my hair
while I sit on your big chair
Snip a little here,
Snip a little there
Mister Barber cut my hair.

She's also been allowed to practise cutting her own and other people's hair with a toy scissors. It took a few months to get her used to her hair. Before she would squeal in horror whenever it fell. So, is it any wonder that at the kiddy barber, their first question is, " Is she scared of hair?"

Here she is getting ready. I felt very tickled by how small she looked when the pink cloak was placed over her.

And admiring herself, while also being entertained by Barney on the tv screen in front of her ( yup, this place really knows how to make the experience less of an ordeal)

Look at her fascinated face...

And here's the finished product.

We told the hairdresser not to cut the hair too short, and for the fringe not to be spastic. So, I must say it was a job well done for $16. Will be back again.

NOROVIRUS

2007-01-02T18:35:00.000+08:00

More like the Ebola Virus. Yup, that's how we regard it. So brutal, so powerful. Despite all our attempts, I fell prey to it yesterday. Terrible body ache, diarrheoa, nausea or vomitting. Now, my mother in law - the one who prepares all the food! - got it too! How like that?

I pray to God the kids don't get it and that it stops there. But if you read the info below on how contagious it is, I am quite doubtful but I will be doing all I can!

To prepare all you guys out there, here's some info below:

What are Noroviruses?

Noroviruses are a group of viruses that are the most common cause of gastroenteritis (stomach bugs) in England and Wales. In the past, noroviruses have also been called ‘winter vomiting viruses’, ‘small round structured viruses’ or ‘Norwalk-like viruses’.

How does Norovirus spread?

The virus is easily transmitted from one person to another. It can be transmitted by contact with an infected person; by consuming contaminated food or water or by contact with contaminated surfaces or objects.

What are the symptoms?

The symptoms of norovirus infection will begin around 12 to 48 hours after becoming infected. The illness is self-limiting and the symptoms will last for 12 to 60 hours. They will start with the sudden onset of nausea followed by projectile vomiting and watery diarrhoea. Some people may have a raised temperature, headaches and aching limbs. Most people make a full recovery within 1-2 days, however some people (usually the very young or elderly) may become very dehydrated and require hospital treatment.

Why does Norovirus often cause outbreaks?

Norovirus often causes outbreaks because it is easily spread from one person to another and the virus is able to survive in the environment for many days. Because there are many different strains of Norovirus, and immunity is short-lived, outbreaks tend to affect more than 50% of susceptible people. Outbreaks usually tend to affect people who are in semi-closed environments such as hospitals, nursing homes, schools and on cruise ships.

How can these outbreaks be stopped?

Outbreaks can be difficult to control and long-lasting because norovirus is easily transmitted from one person to another and the virus can survive in the environment. The most effective way to respond to an outbreak is to disinfect contaminated areas, to institute good hygiene measures including hand-washing and to provide advice on food handling. Those who have been infected should be isolated for up to 48 hours after their symptoms have ceased.

How is norovirus treated?

There is no specific treatment for norovirus apart from letting the illness run its course. It is important to drink plenty of fluids to prevent dehydration.

If I’m suffering from norovirus, how can I prevent others from becoming infected?

Good hygiene is important in preventing others from becoming infected – this includes thorough hand washing before and after contact. Food preparation should also be avoided until 3 days after symptoms have gone altogether.

Who is at risk of getting norovirus?

There is no one specific group who are at risk of contracting norovirus – it affects people of all ages. The very young and elderly should take extra care if infected, as dehydration is more common in these age groups.

Outbreaks of norovirus are reported frequently in semi-closed institutions such as hospitals, schools, residential and nursing homes and hotels. Anywhere that large numbers of people congregate for periods of several days provides an ideal environment for the spread of the disease. Healthcare settings tend to be particularly affected by outbreaks of norovirus. A recent study done by the Agency shows that outbreaks are shortened when control measures at healthcare settings are implemented quickly, such as closing wards to new admissions within 4 days of the beginning of the outbreak and implementing strict hygiene measures.

What can be done to prevent infection?

It is impossible to prevent infection, however, taking good hygiene measures (such as frequent hand washing) around someone who is infected is important. Certain measures can be taken in the event of an outbreak, including the implementation of basic hygiene and food handling measures and prompt disinfection of contaminated areas, and the isolation of those infected for 48 hours after their symptoms have ceased. Is this even possible with a young family to take care of?

Angelic Angie

2006-12-29T16:58:00.000+08:00

Most of you know lots about Ally. It's easy to get caught up with the one who demands more attention, :). So, I'd just like to let you know a bit more about Angie.

This little 7-month old is seriously just like her name - a darling angel. She is just soooo sweet and gentle. It's easier to describe her when I compare with Ally, who is quite different!

That's Ally pumping her milk, something she has to do every morning just like her mommy

Ally is a chatterbox , a "zi zar por" or a "nenek" ( what her teacher calls her). Angie is quiet and softspoken. She purrs often and squeals when she is excited or happy. Most of the time though, she is happy to sit back quietly and observe all the action, namely her sister's antics. I have a feeling she will definitely be quieter that Ally, since from 3 months Ally was always cooing and ahhing in her baby babble. Till today, it's also non stop chatter from the time she wakes up at 7pm to bedtime at 8pm.

Ally used to love to SIT, only standing at one year and walking a month later. At 7 months, Angie is already cruising ( ie holding on chairs etc for support while she moves around) She sat up at 61/2 months, crawled proper a week later, then pulled herself to standing a few days later and now she is cruising. We predict she should be walking by 10 months or earlier, judging from her physical prowness. Unless she decides to concentrate on her speech and the physical part slows down. Hmm.

Ally was a real nightmare at bedtime. Angie, as you now all know, sleeps like an angel. Mark and I are proud that we have mastered the art ( or so we think). Angie doesn't cry much when she wakes up too. Often, we'll find her playing by herself when we peep into her cot the next morning or after her naps.

As the days go by, it is very hard not to want to keep picking Angie up for a cuddly hug. She just loves it and will snuggle up to you too. Needless to say, Angie has her own fans too. Auntie Susan, my brother's maid calls her affectionately "cheeky cheeky" and actually needs to come up down and carry her every morning. Her godparents, especially Godpa Jonathan are also equally smitten.

Ahhh, darling Angie.

Ally growing up

2006-12-28T22:31:00.000+08:00

I just have to record this down as a milestone in Ally's emotional development.

You see, Moo Moo Cow, one of three soft toys she takes to bed everynight, fell sick. Well, actually his neck had a hole and fur kept spilling out.

Mark was disgusted and told me to throw it away while Ally was asleep. I said we couldn't, not without asking Ally and letting her know beforehand. He was like, "suit yourself, but anyway she won't understand one".

So when Ally awoke, I took her aside with Moo Moo Cow and told her, " Moo Moo Cow is sick, we have to throw him away" She said,"OK!" in her usual chirpy tone. Mark gave me a triumphant look. I looked back at Ally and noticed she was rather quiet. I said again, " So we'll throw Moo Moo Cow away yah Ally because he's sick."

She said "Ok Mummy, It's ok Mummy" again but tears were welling up in her eye and her lips were quivering. I then realised she was feeling really sad but was trying to put on a brave chirpy front. But this front crumbled and she finally burst into tears.

My dear little Ally is able to feel a sense of loss, she's growing up.

Monster Stomach Virus

2006-12-28T22:15:00.000+08:00

There's some bad virus going around. Ally's 2 year old cousin Rachel got it first, vomitting most of her meals out and had loose stools for a few days. She had it since Sunday. Since then, her entire family has succumbed to it except for little Ruebens.

My maid Delia just recovered from 1 day of intense vomitting and diarrhea. Mark, Myself, Angie and Ally are still ok so far. We've been washing our hands like ten thousand times and meticulously sterilising everything.

Apparently, the virus is extremely contagious and an infected person remains contagious up to 2 weeks after recovery. Some might even carry the virus but not display symptoms. That must be us.

Anyway, we both felt nauseous today and have a slight queasy stomach. For everyone else, the virus struck in the middle of the night. So tonight may be our turn. I am determined not to get it with some positive thinking, if that can shield me! Mark took four charcoal pills.

Good night!

BREAKING NEWS: ANGIE IS SLEEPING THROUGH THE NIGHT!

2006-12-14T09:33:00.000+08:00

Hello hello, this is me bright and cheery in the morning because... Angie now sleeps through the night!!! And I am not talking about just 6 hours at a stretch type of thing. She sleeps from 8pm to 730 am, with nary a whimper in between. The first time was two days ago, so I wanted to make sure it was not a one off thing before posting this entry. And it is not! She did it again last night!

Mark and I were hopping around in ecstacy the first night. Could it be?! We are finally going to be well rested! We can finally sneak off at night if neccessary for a little while at least. Frankly, Mark and I view this "sleeping through the night" as one of the most important milestones in our kid's life, more so than sitting up and crawling... ahahaha.

It's has taken a lot of hard work to get to this stage and we are glad that it has paid off. Many of you might recall the difficult time that I had with Ally. (Ally's Sleep Story) and how we had to let her "cry it out" in the end.

Well, we were determined not to let Angie cry it out since it is terribly heartbreaking while it is being done.:) So, from 2 months, we made sure she had a very regular nap and bedtime routine. The general rule of thumb according to Dr Weissbluth (sleep guru) is to start putting the baby down for a nap after about one and two hours of wakefulness. Sometimes, you have to just watch the baby for signs that she is sleepy - namely a dazed look..( ahha,) yawning, laying head down on your shoulder and general quietness. That is the cue to start soothing her to sleep. Once she starts crying and arching her back, you've crossed the key moment and it will be difficult to put her to sleep. As for her bedtime, we made sure she slept at 8pm after her bath, like Ally, sometimes even earlier if we feel she is tired.

Of course, we had plenty of missed cues, especially when different caretakers took over or when Mark and I were just too tired to follow the schedule. But 85 per cent of the time Angie took her naps at the right time and went to bed at the right time. THIS regular routine definitely paved the way for the " sleeping through the night"

I have to admit something though. The turning point came four days ago. We still let her cry it out.:)

She's been a relatively good baby waking up maybe once or twice a night. But four days ago, Mark and I were both sick so even those few times was tiring for us. So Mark just lay beside her cot on the floor and let her cry. She cried for 10 mins and then SLEPT till the next morning. We were pleasantly surprised and decided not to pick her up the next night. You know what, she cried for 5 mins and slept through again. Next day, she slept all the way and the rest is history (crossing my fingers!)

Letting her cry it out was much easier though, as compared to Ally. Her cries were more like whimpers and there would be breaks in between. Ally cried till she vomitted. She could cry nonstop in a very frantic way for up to an hour. She could call Mama too. I think it was because she was a good 2 months older and was used to sleeping with her parents on the same bed. Angie has been sleeping in her own cot since birth ( because she's a roller and it is very irritating sleeping with her" :)" so she had less of an adjustment to make.

Ah well. Hope this helps all sleepless parents out there. Mark's friends Irving and Beth recently let their son cry it out too after he started waking up every hour. After three days, he now sleeps through the night. It is very effective and better for the child since he can now get his much needed sleep. Trust me, the baby is seriously happy the next day.

So regular routine is a must and "cry it out" if neccessary.

Terrorising Insects

2006-12-02T18:05:00.000+08:00

Here's how Ally scolds lizards, bees and spiders.

" You DON'T disturb me. I BOX YOU DEAD. I EAT you up. I got big big muscle you know because... I drink my milk and I eat a lot of scrambled egg....

It is soooo funny what she comes up with nowadays that we like to keep asking her open ended questions and listens to the wackiest answers she comes up with.

Do they look like sisters?

2006-12-02T18:01:00.000+08:00

Lately, Angie has been looking alot like Mark and most people say Ally really looks like me. But looking at this photo, I think they both look quite alike ... no?

Rubens Ng is born!!!

2006-12-02T17:22:00.000+08:00

Yay, the first boy in our Ng Family after 33 years has been born! He arrived at 1748 yesterday at Thomson Medical Centre. Look at his gorgeous head of hair! And he has a very nicely shaped head too. All thanks definitely to the amazing labour that his mum had.

Here's the supermum Ling Fong, all well and alert. If you thought I was brave giving birth without epidural (Birthing Angie), then you will kow tow to this one. She was induced and also gave birth with NO EPIDURAL. Plus, she did not tear at all, so no stitches either. What a marvelous birth!

In fact, she was still walking around at Novena Square about 3 hours before Rubens popped out. If anything, this is a lesson to all second time and beyond expectant mums. Never underestimate how fast your baby can come out! Another lesson, the contraction stage does not have to be super painful. Most of the time, it can be managed. Dr Adrian Tan, Ling Fong's Obgyn induced her at noon and actually told her to go "gai gai". He said he encourages movement to just take the mother's mind off the labour. So, Ling Fong had a huge steak for lunch and I think did a spot of shopping after being induced.

She then came back to the clinic to be monitored. Her contractions were getting closer and she said the feeling was pretty crampy but manageable. Close to 5pm, the nurses said it was about time she checked into the delivery ward. My brother busied himself with all the admin registration and Ling Fong was brought to the room for her preparation. You know, they gave her an enema and asked her to go to the toilet but everything progressed really fast from there.

She suddenly felt the urge to push. Ah, there is no mistaking this urge... My brother stepped in just in time to hold her. Ling Fong very innocently asked for her epidural but I think the nurse gave her a bemused look and said, "what epidural, you're fully dilated and the baby is coming out now.. no time for epidural already lah . Ling Fong probably had the same reaction as my other friend Sher Maine (Birthing Terror)who did not realise how far along she was till in the delivery ward. Basically," I WANT MY EPIDURAL! GIVE ME MY EPIDURAL!"

Anyway, the nurses told my brother to gas her at that point to stop her from pushing. A few floors away, Dr Adrian Tan was doing the 100m dash to the delivery ward. Two pushes was all it took I think, and the baby was out!!!

Glorious Birth. If anything, it inspires me. After my successful hypnobirthing VBAC, I've suddenly become a scaredy cat again as I wonder if for my third child, I might be able to replicate the same calmness. What if the next time it is painful? Knowing that Ling Fong did it this time round, I am convinced again that everything is manageable, really. Yay!

Here's a picture of the happy family. Rubens has a loud hearty cry, very much like his sister Rachel. Hhahah.It's going to be a noisy household!

Updates on my 2 munchkins

2006-11-18T22:30:00.000+08:00

So, the weaning from the breast has been successful! Angie now drinks from the bottle and a lot too! I think she is going through some 6 month growth spurt or something and so wolfs down like 200ml of milk 7-8 times a day. I am so glad I made the decision to switch to the bottle or I would up every night trying to satiate her never ending hunger. Honestly, I don't think I can produce that much man!

After we successfully reintroduced the bottle, Angie's sleep habits did improve back to waking up just twice a night and going right back to sleep after. She's also started sleeping from 8 pm at night! Yayaya. Mark and I are homefree from 8 to do our own thing. Ths week though she's a little off kilter after we took her to a wedding a few days ago - that kind of wrecked everything ...so you know we will probably skip all night outings for her till she is more stabalised.

One not so good thing though about the whole weaning from breast episode is that she has now developed a preference for formula milk and resists breast milk. It's probably like how I prefer the taste of full cream milk to low fat skimmed milk. So, we have to sneak the breast milk in in small quantities. I'm going to try and give her some breast milk for as long as possible since I truely believe in its antibodies.

Something seems to be happening to my body too.. I feel like my womb is reactivating itself. Because I now pump only 3 times a day, I have a feeling I am going to start becoming fertile again. Hahha. Anyway, I am definitely taking a longer break till my third kid.......

NOW ON TO ALLY

She's done her first pee and poo in the potty!! Yay!

We're pretty pleased at how its all progressed so smoothly. There was a lot of pressure from the in laws to start training her from months back but we wanted to just let her go when she was ready. All we did was leave her little potty around for her to get accustomed to. We read that things move much faster that way.

She's matured so much since Angie was born. From two weeks ago, she would go to the drain to pee while she was swimming. So, we realised she knows when she is going to pee.

Then, the other day, she frantically hopped around holding her pee as she waited for us to put on her diaper as she did not want to dirty the floor.

Just last Sunday at church, she amazed me when she said, " Mummy, go away, I am going to poo poo... so smelly!" she then insisted that I look away while she did her business. As we were by the fish pond (yes, I spend most of the time there during mass since she cannot keep still), a little boy came by to look at the fishes too and the poor girl stopped her business till he was gone as she was embarrassed! Can you imagine, my little baby can be paiseh!!

Once she was done, I told her we should go change her diaper and she asked me " Change where?" I just pointed to a flat spot but she refused and only agreed once we managed to get a quiet empty room.. She was embarrassed that people would find her poo smelly!!! aiyoh, my little girl has grown up!

So anyway, she finally pooed in the potty this morning, then promptly ran away screaming!! Hahhaah, first time she has seen her poo ..since the rest of time we clean up for her while she lies down.

So that's the updates for my two daughters.

Now, we're all eagerly awaiting the arrival of Reubens Ng, my brother's second child. Ling Fong is now 39 weeks and just waiting around to go into labour. After a whole batch of girls, this will be theh first boy in many years, for my dad, it will his first boy in 33 years. Boy will this one be pampered. But he will be rightly put in place by his three older playmates - Alison, Rachel and Angie. Hhehe.

No more breast

2006-10-30T09:24:00.000+08:00

It's been a tough week since I got back from New York. Angie, who fared really well with the bottle while I was away for 1 week, is now not sleeping well and constantly waking up. The reason according to Mark is that she is HUNGRY and I don't have enought milk to satisfy her.

It's been a big emotional battle for me. I think it is just as hard for me as for Angie ( probably harder for me) to give up feeding by the breast. The tenderness and closesness you feel for the baby is so intense and nothing can match it. And I always thought I would feed her for more than a year, to match Alison's feeding time or more.But it is a decision that has to be made and sadly, I have decided to wean her off the breast.

It's quite logical really.
1. Angie needs a lot of milk- she drinks much more than Ally - like 150 ml each time and about 6-8 times a day. And she can't sleep if she is still hungry.
2. I'm not producing enough milk for her. My milk supply is just not like before, probably because I have more commitments now like running after Alison, the business. Angie staying up because she's not getting enough is also wearing me thin, and as a result I keep falling sick. I'm sick like every 2 weeks... flu, cough, diarrhea, mastitis...you name it. I basically have no immune system loh! And me falling sick means even less milk!
3. For Angie, it's all breast or nothing. Since I came back, we thought we could do a combination of bottle and breast, supplementing with formula when necessary. But Angie flatly refuses the bottle once she knows I am around, whether its breast milk or formula, and would rather starve. I can't go away right since I am the mother! Yet I can't meet her needs with my dwindling milk supply which dwindles as each day goes by with her not sleeping well. So, basically, we just have to get her used to the bottle ONLY.
4. I can't give up the business. You know, when I was not working and had only Ally, I could take afternoon naps and sleep early so life was easy and my body was very healthy. Now, it's a wreck as I try frantically to balance everything. Something's got to give and so it has to be the breast.
5. Mark is dying too as he has to bear with Angie's cries since she sleeps with us ( There is no other room,:() So, we've got to get her back on track.

I admit that I'm very sad about this. For me, it's very personal and I don't think Mark will understand. I know he has my best interests at heart too and I agree that I gotta do something to get my own health back on track.

On the bright side, She is going to hit the magic 6 month mark and it's not bad that I've lasted this long with exclusive breastfeeding. And I am still going to continue giving breast milk but in a bottle. And I hope to do this, giving at least some breast milk for as long as possible. I strongly believe the antibodies in the breast milk can really help the baby.

And you know, there are good points to this. Namely that it will eventually free me up and not keep me so tied to home so I can do more for the business.

Of course now it's a big mess this week. Mark has gone overseas and my mum in law will be staying over for the next few days to help in the weaning. We're doing it cold turkey, Angie only gets the bottle. Once she is used to it, I will attempt to feed the bottle too.

Sometimes, I feel quite weak too. How come other mothers can handle like everything and I can't? They can sleep like a few hours everyday too and still manage everything.Hah, my in laws say I am the delicate type, just like my mum, so no training. And never eat enough meat or something. Tis true I think, my nusband's side never falls sick. But I never used to until this year lah... so it's the new demands lah.. just give me time to adapt.

Anyway, I think this is the right way. Do share your thoughts with me.. but encouraging ones lah.:)

Creeping Angie

2006-10-02T21:16:00.000+08:00

I said before that Angie seems to be crawling. Well, we can now confirm it. She can creep about on her stomach really well. I think it's pretty advanced for 4 months, no?

Here she is doing just that. And check out her "jee xiao" older sister in the background.

Angie can roll over!

2006-09-24T22:30:00.000+08:00

Angie's has reached that important milestone.

Actually, she flipped onto her tummy about 2 weeks ago but you know me lah, so sick no time to write.

So, anyway, she did it at 3.5 months and since then, she's been at it non stop. She flips the minute we lay her on her back. No kidding. She even practises in the middle of the night, which is quite frustrating as her head keeps banging into me and waking me up.

She's even trying to crawl it seems.

Don't want to compare but Ally rolled over one whole month later.. hehe. Hiyah, but it's probably due to the fact that Angie gets more time to herself while princess Ally was always carried around last time.

Anyway, Angie is also a good 1/2 kg heavier than Ally at the same stage too.

I have videos of both of them flipping for the first time, but no time to put up lah. I'm amazed I've written so many entries this week already! Must be the burst of new life received from the thought of getting part time help!

I'm 30!

2006-09-24T22:01:00.000+08:00

Yup, finally hit the big 3-0 yesterday.

Despite all my grousing, I'm actually very happy with where I am at 30.

I'm married to a fantastic husband, someone I love and respect with all my heart!

I have two beautiful kids! (Me, imagine, when I was younger I said I never want to give birth because it's too painful!) Luckily I just did it, and I can enjoy my little bundles.

I've also started my own business, and basically found my passion and true calling! ( When I was younger, I wanted to set up a bookstore, then it was a spa, then I somehow ended up in PR and then journalism, but finally I opened my very own retail store!) And my husband and family support me all the way!

Perhaps my only regret is that my mum is no longer around to see me and my two kids. I'm very happy she hung in there to see me get married and to see Alison born.That is truely a blessing and I'm sure she's also watching us from above. Still, a part of me wishes she was still here with us. She would have been great with the kiddos and they would have simply adored her.

We hired a part time housekeeper...

2006-09-23T22:41:00.000+08:00

Yup, you read right. We hired a part-time housekeeper. And yes, we still have our maid!

What the F**k right?!

Well, Mark and I made the decision last night. At 10pm, both of us lay slumped over the sofa, thoroughly exhausted! It had been a bad day for me. I was still semi sick after recovering from a 3 day bout of flu, mastitis and diarrhea ( Infact, I'm still nursing a never ending cold and cough). I had to bring my maid to the doctor because she complained she was sick as Alison, who sleeps with her, keeps waking up and coughing. And get this, the family dog ( who does not stay with me but is still somehow under my care whenever he is ill) had an eye infection and my dad wanted me to take him to see the doctor. My in laws are away on holiday, I had a business meeting in the afternoon and little Angeline just didn't seem to want to sleep or eat the whole afternoon.

No doubt this was one of the worst days of the week and other days are better, but it's pretty much this hectic. In about 3 weeks, Maternity Exchange is moving to Marina Square. So this month has been filled with meetings with the interior designers and public relations consultant, printers, suppliers as I rush to get the new shop ready. It's going to get even busier. And with me constantly falling sick and triggering off a chain reaction from all the tired souls around me like my maid who has to pick up the caretaking duties when I am ill and vice versa, the shop work just never gets done.

The ony quiet time I have to do work for the business is from 10pm after Angeline is finally asleep for the night. But guess what, by then I am totally pooped and my brain is wonky. If I don't sleep, I will most surely fall sick. So that's what happens lah because I have no other time to do the work ( mothers who work from home and have a 2 year old and a totally breastfed 4month old who won't take the bottle have it tough! ). Worst of all, my milk supply drops drastically when I am tired and Angeline gets frustrated and she doesn't take her naps and .... you get my drift!

So, anyway, the key is to lighten my baby caring load so I can do some business work in the day. And to do that, we need to free my maid of her strenuous household duties like the ironing ( which never gets done now because of the babies) and mopping.That also leaves my maid enough time to just rest in the afternoon sometimes when Alison naps to recover from a bad night earlier from Alison's constant wakings ( Hope she outgrows this phase soon), and hopefully be strong enough to fight off all the flu bugs that come along. And with her stronger and freer, I can get her to help take care of Angeline a bit more so I have time to do some work in the day. Then I can sleep well at night, my milk supply with be ok, Angeline will be happy, I won't fall sick so often and overall, everybody will be happy.

All this for $200 a month for 1 day of part time help a week. It's worth it! I'm thinking once things settle down with the shop and the baby gets older and is less clingy and dependent on me, we can probably do away with it. But it's essential this month. Hell, I'm flying overseas in 3.5 weeks for a buying trip and I can't even pump out 10ml of milk - how like that!

Those of you who are wondering if my in laws can help. They do actually, they take Alison home in the afternoon twice a week. But Mark and I have decided not to trouble them any further so they can enjoy their retirement years spent doing their own thing.

Angie's now a Catholic!

2006-09-03T21:23:00.000+08:00

Today, Angie was baptised at Holy Family Church. Her baptism name is also Angeline.

Like the true angel she is, she slept through the entire service, even when water was poured over her head. Ahhh, the mark of a "holy" being! Alison slept through her baptism too, so it's hard to find a single shot of the event with either of them awake!

We deduced it must be the dress... my parents bought this long, intricately woven white gown from France that cost a whopping $700 and it's been a tradition for all the grandchildren to wear it at their christening.

Alison was the first. Then, Rachel. And now Angie.

It looks very fussy and hot, and it's pretty tedious carrying the baby with so much material but for some reason, the babies love it and always fall asleep while wearing it (except Rachel lah)

So, anyway here's a group shot. Angie's godparents are to our left: Uncle Jonathan and Auntie Karen.

May all the kids grow up to be dear devout catholic girls!

Our 3rd Year Anniversary

2006-08-29T16:11:00.000+08:00

It seems like it's been a long time but you know what, it's only been three years since Mark and I got married. Probably due to the fact that so much has happened since then. We went through my mum's death, had two beautiful kids, and started my very own business. Such life changing moments in just a short span of three years!

Have we changed at all? Compare the pictures of us as boyfriend and girlfriend about 7 years back, in our wedding best and now with two kids.

Mark and I like to comment on how chiseled we used to look a few years back. Ok, we're not fat now but the body shape has changed a little lah hah. Mark's tummy area follows my shape through each pregnancy. .. Ha.

Anyway, here's some interesting snippets of our life together:

* Mark's first gift to me was a clipboard that could be attached to the computer so that I could read my notes and type at the same time. I mentioned that it was a good idea when I visited him in his university hostel room ( Ah, I had no idea he liked me then). The next week, there it was hanging on the door knob of my own hostel door in a very cheepo red plastic bag. It was "then" that I knew.

I can't remember what my first gift to him was...! But I am so bad at this "gift" thing we had a heated argument very very early on in our courtship. I was so unlike his previous "doting make very nice cards, cook yummy muffins" girlfriend in this aspect he was totally taken aback. BUT all's well that ends well, he lowered his expectations! and here we are! heheheee

* I showed my love for him by taking care of him when he fell sick with a high fever a day after a big church concert that we were both involved in. I came over to his house and showered him with attention. He said he knew "it was love" then.

* We "went steady" at the stroke of midnight on 1 Jan 2000, the new millenium. He asked me amidst all the merrymaking at a party on Sentosa. Corny but I think it was romantic!

* Mark proposed to me at Andaman Spa in Langkawi. It was a surprise trip and he popped the question when I was at my most vulnerable.. with just a towel wrapped around myself after a fantastic massage. The sun was setting just then so we had a magnificent view of the horizon and the sea all at that moment. Ahhhhh.

Ok, I shan't bore you guys with more magic moments .... :) we're having a nice dinner tonight at Au Jardin and leaving the kids behind! True to form, I did not get a gift again ( yes, tsk tsk tsk tsk.... I wonder why anyone would want to marry me.. ahha) but I did write a note. And I've posted it here for all of you to know what a wonderful man I married and what he puts up with a wife like me!

Dear Mark,

Thank you for courting me in the first place
Or I would never have found you. ( Ha... ask me what that means!)

Thank you for being the “calm” in the midst of all my frantic worrying!
Or I would be a nervous wreck by now.

Thank you for supporting me in whatever I do, like Maternity Exchange.
It’s really helped me to lead a fulfilling life.

Thank you for being such a good father,
Carrying the two babies, changing diapers and putting them to sleep,
I would not be as good a mother if not for your support!

Thank you for listening to my endless complaints and concerns
It’s helped preserve my sanity!

Thank you too for scolding me! when the complaints get too much
It’s helped me appreciate and remember how lucky I am.

Thank you for making all your funny faces
It never fails to cheer me up.

Thank you for cooking for me occasionally
I really like your food!

Thank you for bearing with my all my little idyosyncracies and unusual phobias! (You know which ones!?)
I feel better just knowing you know.

Thank you for just loving me.
I feel happy and complete just knowing you do.

I love you,
Debbie.

Ally turns two!

2006-08-21T23:45:00.000+08:00

Parties for kids are a really tiring affair. And anyway, we're told kids younger than four can't really appreciate it anyway. But we decided to have one for Ally's second birthday to let her know she was still special even with the new baby around.

We kept to all the rules parenting books prescribe for a successful 2 year old's party.

1.Keep it small and limit it to adults the birthday kid is familiar with. Here's a group shot.

I guess it's still quite big by some standards, but not by us since Ally's first month and one year bash had many many more. Don't ask me why but my dad got all excited with Ally being the first grandchild and decided to invite, like the whole world. Anyway, we're lucky to actually have a number of friends with children in the same age group so the party is always pretty well attended!

2.Keep entertainment simple and make sure there are enough toys to go around since this is the age where "everything is mine!" For this bunch of 2 year olds and under, I just scattered some groovy toys around:

22-month old Joshua backing out in his BMW.

Bubbles are always a hit.

And these really cute helium filled pets!

They don't come cheap at $16 each from the Concourse party shops. I managed to bargain down to $12 each. Still expensive but worth it lah. You've got to see them up close. They're from Japan and designed so well they're weighed down just enough by little paper legs so that they can be pulled along like pets. Ally fell in love with them at a friend, Gor Gor David's party so I just had to get them this time. Each kid got to bring one pet home with them.

Finally we kept the party short and sweet. Everything was wrapped up in two hours and by 630pm, everyone had gone home. Only the two ribena drunkards Ally and cousin Rachel were left behind, gulping down their favourite drink...

and creating a ruckus on the piano after.

First Long Sentence

2006-08-17T00:03:00.000+08:00

I'm noting this down so I will never forget.

Ally amazed me this week with two perfectly constructed sentences:

" That's Auntie Georgina in the picture."
" Ah Ma forgot to take back the plastic bag"

Even her tense is correct. My goodness, I am so proud of her.

Super Mum

2006-08-16T21:43:00.000+08:00

Once in a while, I feel a burst of energy and decide to take everybody out!

Today, we went to the beach. Me, Alison, Angeline, Rachel, Delia and Susan. Check out my brood.

Whenever I do this, I often get loads of stares from passers-by who probably think all the kids are mine.

It doesn't help that Rachel gets a kick out of calling me "Mummy" all the time too. Ha ha.

Actually, come to think of it, everyone calls me either "Mum" or "Mummy" in this group.

Mother to all. Ahhahahahah

The teacher must think we don't care

2006-08-10T22:59:00.000+08:00

Because on the eve of National Day, Ally was the only one in her pre-school NOT dressed in red and white.

Her mummy and daddy did not read the note placed inside her school bag that informed us of this.

Actually, her mummy and daddy did not read ALL the notes placed in the bag since she started pre-school 3 months ago. Arrrggh.

We just keep forgetting! Both Mark and I were always the lazy type and never bothered to pack or repack our own school bags! And when your kid is so young she never really talks about what happens in school (or at least you don't know which part is true because she usually just repeats what you say), it's hard to have been prepared right?

So, for the past three months, we have forgotten to let her bring a soft toy for "zoo" day, an umbrella for her "rainy day" activity, an A3 file for all her artwork and goodness knows what else.

The good thing is Ally probably isn't affected. She's happy everyday and never complains that she was the odd one out today. Everthing's ok as long as she has a cool water bottle it seems.

Breastfeeding - tough for the trendy and shy

2006-08-09T22:32:00.000+08:00

Ok, it's undeniable that breastmilk is best for baby and for mum. But it is a little "trying" for the fashion conscious because

* It is so difficult to find a nursing bra good for trendy outfits!
I swear the current nursing bras out there are meant to be worn under big, fuddy-duddy t shirts because they all have thick ugly straps and are made of cotton material that bunches up under your fitting outfits, giving that crinkled look around the boobies.

It never fits as well as it does on the model in the picture! The one nursing bra I love is currently sold in my shop Maternity Exchange and is imported from the UK. It is super soft, super comfy and has 'thin" straps which look good under spaghetti strap tops. But I still haven't found the perfect bra to wear under my tube tops. Yes, there is no such thing as a good strapless nursing bra around. I've tried some by the local maternity brands but they are all way too tight and it's always free size. Considering that I am already on the small side, I wonder who else can fit into those bras. Please let me know if you have found a good strapless bra!

* Nursing pads show through so easily!
I am so tired of having to change my outfit because I can always see the outline of my nursing pads! They look like two fried egg whites! The only time they don't show is under a shapeless loose top. Even my dark coloured tank tops are not spared the telltale round outlines. I tried a padded nursing bra by a local brand but the padding was just too thick. By the time I added the nursing pads in, I looked like Dolly Parton.

But I think I might have found the solution in lilypadz. These are stick-ons that work by exerting constant pressure on the nipples so that there is no let-down and mums don't leak. Much like how nursing mums are told to use your arm to exert pressure on the nipple to control the let down. Anyone tried this? If they work, then it's hooray for fashionable mums who can wear tight tops again!

* Your clothes are always crumpled!
But then this is the case for anyone with kids.... hahah

* You are stuck wearing "separates"
It's impossible to lift a dress to feed and the range of nursing dresses out there is still rather limited.

Nursing is also tough for the shy or conservative ones. Even with nursing tops making it easier to nurse discreetly, it is still an ART to do it without anyone noticing. I think perhaps the only one who can do this is Sharon Norton, owner of Mothers En Vogue and who makes great nursing wear. I remember having a meeting with her once when she just picked her 2 year old daughter up and very seamlessly latched her on with not a nipple in sight.

For the rest of us, it is usually quite difficult to get the baby to latch on so discreetly. If your baby is the impatient type or the noisy when hungry type, die. Good luck to you trying to nurse unnoticed.

Now that I am nursing my second baby, I have gotten much more experienced and am confident enough to feed in public. It's quite funny though how some people react. Because it looks like I am just cradling the baby in my arms, some friends, especially the males, will come right up to my side to talk to me, the back away in shock when they realise what's happening there! Hahah. All the while still trying to conceal their shock as they don't want to seem like they disapprove.

I'm so happy!!!!!

2006-07-29T21:53:00.000+08:00

Ally @ School

2006-07-28T22:54:00.000+08:00

It's been 3 months since Ally started pre-school. After a short two weeks of crying, she now loves it! She the second youngest in the school, so the older kids like to take care of her.

Every morning, my maid will send her to school by Bus No.158. This is the highlight of the morning for Ally. She loves sitting on the bus. In fact, this was how we enticed her to go to school in the first place- the bus ride!

These are her two favourite teachers: First, Huang Lao Shi. Everybody loves this teacher,probably because she looks so warm and caring. And Miss Madeline, who is also the principal of the school.

I followed the class on an excursion to the zoo and I can tell the teachers really care for the kiddos. So, I'm pleased with the school.

Here are some shots of the kids in her school. This is Rupert (one on the left), the boy that Ally likes but who doesn't quite return her affection.:(

Then there's Bryan, one of a pair of identical twins. I like this one. He's just 18 months but look at him! He walks like an adorable little bear and the teachers tell me he is prone to falling asleep while walking and even eating. On the way back from the zoo , the teachers had to fish a half eaten sausage out of his mouth as he fell asleep chewing!

And here's some other kids from her class.

Somebody's just not sleeping!

2006-07-26T21:23:00.000+08:00

And it's not Angie this time but Ally!

After that torturous cry it out method that we used when she was 7 months, we now have a new problem on our hands as she turns two years.

As I am writing this, Mark is putting her back to bed for what 10th, 11, 12, 13, 14.... time and still counting. Experts call it the Jack in the Box syndrome. Yes, she just hops out of bed time after time after time.

Yes, those horrible kids you saw on super nanny who keep on coming out from their bed to find their parents.. that's ALLY now

(I can hear her crying furiously now) as the father uts her back in bed for the 15, 16, 17, 18 , 19th time.

Dr Weisbluth says you have to avoid eye contact and be totally silent as we put her back in bed. There should no communication or attention as that is what she wants.

It's going to be a long night. We saw the signs coming and have tried to nip it in the bud. Delia our maid who sleeps with told us Ally keeps waking up in the middle of the night, climbing out of her bed onto Delia's bed and trying to get her attention.

We've briefed Delia on the silent treatment method but we don't know if she is seriously doing it. Even a faint smile will keep Ally waking up and continuing to talk about the rabbits and carrots.

(Oops. now the plan has failed ... the maid has picked her up. Mark says let Delia learn the consequences)

Ally and Angie

2006-07-16T23:07:00.000+08:00

6 weeks have passed and we've come to realise that lookswise, the two girls are pretty different.

This is Ally at 2 weeks

and this is Angie at 2 weeks

This is them again at 6 weeks. Ally's the first pic.

We've noticed that:

Ally has a sharper face while Angie is a real chubby checker. She's surpassing her sister in terms of weight gain too

Angie has the signature Ng family eye bags, formed mostly by the signature Ng family chubby cheeks. Ally has no eyebags.

Ally's outstanding hair was visible from 2 weeks. Angie's hair is way tamer.

In terms of other traits,

Both are vomitters! Angie is nowhere as bad as Ally, who we used to nickname the Merlion or the baby exorcist, because of the numerous times she would spew vomit out of her mouth. Angie vomits pretty frequently too, but it has never shot out of her mouth and most of the time when burped properly, she is fine. Like Ally, she has a very sensitive gag reflex though that causes food to come out easily.

Although my previous post says otherwise, Angie is ,on the whole, a much better sleeper than Ally.We're training her from the start, respecting the 1 to 2 hour window within which young babies should be put down for a nap (according to sleep guru Dr Weisbluth) So, apart from a few bad days, Angie sleeps well. And lately, she can actually soothe herself to sleep. Yes, we put her down awake and 10 minutes later, she is asleep!!! We're crossing our fingers this will carry on.

Angie seems much more physically adept.For a 6 week old, her neck is extremely strong. She can hold her own for quite some time while Ally's neck was real floppy. She also seems to be making attempts to roll over at this early stage.

Anyway, it's just amazing how two girls from the same mummy and daddy can be so different. But that's what makes each of them special isn't it?

I leave you with a gorgeous picture of Ally. She has really grown into a beautiful toddler, don't you think?

Just not sleeping

2006-07-13T22:05:00.000+08:00

Can you imagine?

Today, little Angeline did not sleep from 930am to 830 PM. 9 hours!

For a 5 week old baby, that is scary!

Amazingly, she didn't seem bothered. She stayed wide eyed throughout, but cried the minute we put her down. And the day started to pass in a blur. You know, when you repeat the sleep routine over and over. ...For me, it's FEED, BURP, ROCK A LITTLE, SING LULLABY, put her very slowly down. 2 mins later, she's up. And you do everything over again.

Usually, I can lull myself to sleep even but the little doo doo is still awake.

I think she misses her daddy. He's away in Taiwan, battling some typhoon. He can put her to sleep easily with his low toned lullaby. I think mine is too high pitched.

Can't wait till he gets back. Ok, I hear her again. It's going to be a long night.

Row Row Row your Boat!

2006-06-18T13:22:00.000+08:00

BIG BABY

2006-06-17T16:18:00.000+08:00

Most of you will probably want to know how Ally's coping with the new baby?

Well, from this picture of her squashing herself into her little sister's bed, what do you think? :)

Anyway, Ally seems to like her sister a lot. Comforting her when she cries, and insisting on kissing her goodnight. Here's a clip of her affection.

Ally's new bed

2006-06-17T16:08:00.000+08:00

Check out Ally's new bed. She's been sleeping in her playpen for the past year and we figured it's time she had a better bed.

Don't think the playpen had very good back support. We also wanted her to be able to get out of the bed herself when she woke up in the morning and not feel trapped in the playpen.

So here it is! The equivalent of a queen size bed for the little kiddo. We threw in the tent above for extra fun. All from , where else.. IKEA. They have everything!

Ally absolutely loves it! She can't wait to nap and go to sleep at night now.

Full of SH*T!

2006-06-16T10:10:00.000+08:00

15 days!

That's how long I went without pooing!

Absolutely disgusting right? And you can't even imagine the discomfort I was in.

There was just so much food in me that never came out! You see, my mother in law has been ensuring that I get all the nutrition I need so I've been eating mountains of food! Except it was all input no output!

I've been so busy taking care of baby I didn't realise the gravity of the situation until the 10th day. I suddenly realised I haven't been to the toilet to poo for a long time.

So, I went.

The next 5 days were excruciating. It always gets worse when suddenly you are aware of the situation and the thought of all the fermented food in you plagues you!

So, anyway, as expected I could not poo. Everything was so so so so soooooooooooooooo hard. It was like trying to pass out another baby through my anus.

I couldn't do it and each trip to the toilet became a nightmare. I got more and more desperate.

I drank a bottle of prune juice, took long walks, drank gallons of water. Still NOTHING! Just a bloated mummy!

Finally dragged myself to a doctor late at night at 9pm. A real crackpot as there was no other doctor around. This old lady doctor actually scolded me and said ," You stupid girl (YES, She said "STUPID"), why didn't you DIG it out?

"Excuse me?" I was flabbergasted. Did I hear correctly? I told her I was not accustomed to doing such things. She gave me a resigned look.

Anyway, her medicine didn't work and on the 14th day (after another round of laxatives from a friend Evelyn), I DID what she said. I literally dug out my poo. Ha ahaha.

I was real desperate. I had started reading up on the internet and they said 15 days was a really dangerously long time. Numerous articles warned of "Faecal Impaction" where the poo has stayed in there so long it hardens and could need an emergency surgical procedure if it is not resolved soon!

I was not going to have an operation after all that "natural" birth thingys I went through. Ridiculous.

Of course, it was me over worrying. Finally, I went to my good ol family GP and she gave me an enema. That's a mineral oil solution they give you to squirt up you anus. It softens everything and finally, I was relieved of my stool!

Now, I think I have piles! And I asked Mark yesterday if perhaps, we can stop at 2. :) He said I said that the last time too,so he's not too concerned.

Anyway, thanks for listening to my shitty tale. And remember, drink tons of water if you're breastfeeding and MOVE, and don't ever ignore the urge to poo when you're busy. You could end up like me!

Birthing my little Angel Angie

2006-06-09T10:52:00.000+08:00

Nothing is impossible, isn’t it? A week after giving birth to Angeline, I am still euphoric over my natural delivery. I still can’t believe that I did it all without epidural either! So anyway, here’s how it all began.

I woke up in the middle of the night at about 4am. The mild menstrual like cramps that I’ve been having since the night before were still there. As is usual around this time, I had a very full bladder and went downstairs to pee. For some unknown reason, I decided to lie down on the bed we had assembled downstairs. This was meant for me to labour on. I guess there’s nothing like a woman’s gut instinct.

At this point, I had a flash of panic. “Oh my god, If this is it, I don’t think I am ready. I haven’t practised my hypnobirthing enough yet. I haven’t massaged my perineum yet!” (something I had been putting off for weeks like I had the luxury of time! Ha!)

I knew I had to relax and grabbed my ipod and earphones and started listening to my birthing affirmations and relaxation scripts. It worked. I became brave again and relaxed. Soon, I realised the cramps were becoming pretty regular, like every 10 mins or so, and they actually came in gentle waves, peaking then tapering off.

From here on, everything was really peaceful and calm. I breathed in with each surge, visualising my uterus dilating. An hour later, I went to the toilet and there was a spot of blood on the toilet paper.

I woke Mark up and told him to call Ginny, my doula. She told us to stay at home and labour and keep her updated. I decided to have some milo and biscuits while I still could. Mark started tottering around, packing stuff.

The rest of the morning (a good 5 hours) passed like a dream. Mark said I just lay there sleeping, hardly even moving. For me, I knew I was busy breathing away each surge that got longer and closer together. It was very manageable though. I can honestly say there was no pain at all, just very strong pressure at the pelvic region. Easy peasy.

In between, I remember asking Mark if we should make our way to the hospital.I didn’t want to get caught in the morning peak hour jam and I didn’t want to go when surges got too uncomfortable. I didn’t want to scare people at the hospital!

But Mark said not yet, he said we don’t want to get there too early and to wait till my contractions were at least 60 seconds long (which would usually mean that I would be about halfway through, 6 to 7 cm dilated) At that point, they were about 30 seconds long. He also said Ginny did not appear to show any urgency, so should be ok to continue at home.

I was so relaxed then I actually agreed (bad move!) and just carried on breathing away the surges as Mark stroked my hand to further relax me. I still can’t believe how relaxed I was.

A very short while later, the contractions started lasting 60 seconds and each time they came, I would order Mark not to touch me. It was a very primal instinct.

Then, suddenly, the surges changed in their nature and I realised I couldn’t breathe in and up anymore but had the urge to breathe down and out. I also started making low grunting noises as I breathed out.

Ginny had told us once the woman starts to make low grunting noises and seems to be bearing down, the baby will be born soon.

I could hear Mark frantically smsing Ginny at this point.

At this point, I had another moment of anxiety, as I started to get the urge to really bear down. What’s more, at each surge, I felt something big and round bulging at my vagina. Shit! I might have to give birth in the car!

I quickly got up to get ready. I actually wanted labour to slow down at this point and was willing the surges AWAY! I hoped that going to the hospital would slow things down . They always say it does.

Well, apparently not when you are so advanced in your labour!

It was quite manic getting ready!The surges were a few minutes apart and when they came, I had to focus all my energy and strength. Mark was dashing back and forth, offering support as each surge came. I made one last trip to the toilet. More blood and I just couldn’t wipe myself clean. The more I wiped, the more mucous and loads of other stuff kept coming out. Screw it, I just moved quickly out before the next surge came.

My journey to the hospital was all but calm. On hindsight, I think I should have left the ipod earplugs in and continued to listen to my relaxation music. I might have looked more like a calm hypnobirthing mum then.

Anyway, one lift was spoilt. So, the maintenance guy and another American chap had the trauma of watching me moan and grip the walls (anything I could get my hands on as each urge to bear down came.)

Ginny came and we all went to the car. She suggested getting on all fours if I found it difficult to sit. I sat on my legs and clutched the back headrest. Ginny guided me through each contraction and when I listened, it became more manageable.

When we reached Thomson Medical at 1pm (the very time I dreaded as it is the busiest time then!), I remember the attendant asking urgently if I was heading for the A and E department. Ginny, the ever calm one simply replied, “No she’s just in labor, we’re going to the labor ward.”

The time in the delivery room was to me the longest part. I spent all four hours pushing. I thought I was the quiet type but truly I can make the loudest “ Kek Sai” sound. Haha. Each time I bore down, I made that low gutteral sound which Mark keeps teasing me about now.

I wanted to birth in the side lying position as I thought it was the most comfortable. It was good for the first part and two hours later, my waterbag burst! So, that was the bulge in my vagina!

Ginny told me things would pick up now as the baby now had space to descend into my pelvis. One and a half hours later of pushing, still no baby’s head.

Dr Paul Tseng had already come in twice and each time, I declined a vaginal examination. Haha, I really didn’t want to be touched. So, he actually went home I think.

I started getting really tired and desperate. Ginny suggested I sit on the birth stool and see if gravity would help the baby come out. I really didn’t want to move but it was THAT or what to me seemed like "never ending pushing!".

Things progressed quickly on the birth stool. Finally, the nurses spotted Angeline’s hair. But I wasn’t pushing effectively. All the breath kept escaping through my mouth as I let out my low moans. Angeline’s head wouldn’t crown.

Finally, Ginny suggested I squat. Oh God, I thought. Where got energy left to squat? But I so wanted Angeline OUT. So, I did.

First push, the baby’s head crowned. Second push, more came out. I could hear the midwife rushing around. She shouted to me, “ Don’t push, wait!” I tried but there was no stopping the urge. Angeline just came tumbling out, heads, shoulders, knees and toes!

We did it!

The birth team that made it all happen! Mark, my brave husband who lent his shoulders for me to push down all the way! Ginny, my fantastic doula without whom I tell you, we would not be able to do it. And Dr Paul Tseng who was so relaxed I never got to panic. By the way, he arrived only after the birth to sew me up! Hah.

Me during labour! NOT! It was relaxing but not that relaxing! This is just after when I was a bit hyper and really estactic, gushing away to Ginny about how amazing it all was!

Breastfeeding immediately after birth. I never did this after my Csection. No chance. This time was wonderful!

The happy parents. Doesn't Angie look like Mark?

Reflections after birth and more video clips coming up! Stay Tuned!

Angeline is out!

2006-06-04T12:03:00.000+08:00

Hi everyone. I've given birth! Last Wednesday at 1715pm.

And we did it the natural way and best of all, drug free too. No epidural!

Angeline is a little bigger than Ally, at 2.86 kg and 49 cm. She's doing really well too.

More on my birth story soon!! Now cannot sit down too long with the stitches down below.:)

All going smoothly.

2006-05-29T15:25:00.000+08:00

Just got back from doctors and everything seems to be going well. I truely believe I am going to have that short, smooth, easy birth I hope for.

Doctor says baby's head is ENGAGED! yay yay. Also, Angie's in the perfect position for an easy birth. It's called Left Occiput Anterior, where the back of the baby's head points towards the mother's front and the baby's back is slightly to the left on the mother's side.

Basically, she's in the position where they'll be the most space for her to just ease herself downwards and out. So, no long backache labours for me. I am so relieved!

Doctor's parting words today were: Ok, see you next Monday, but most probably earlier lah. Finally, a sign that I should give birth soon.

Mark and I predict 1 June, this thursday. We've been talking to Angie and prompting her to make her entry then too. Hahah.

I want her out sooner too as the longer wait has given me STRETCHMARKS. Arrgh, yes, I have stretchmarks radiating out from my belly button. Unmistakable. Was very upset when I first saw them a few days ago but have resigned myself to seeing them as a mom's "badge of honour"

Amazing Births

2006-05-26T11:38:00.000+08:00

So, I am still around. No contractions ( sorry, "surges" as per hypnobirthing speak) yet. But there is lots of pressure down below and at night when I am relaxing I can feel the baby manouvering itself down. Let's hope some work is going on and my cervix is slowly dilating so that I have my work cut out for me when intense labour actually starts.

Anyway, been watching plenty of birth videos in preparation. The actual birthing part is a little freaky to me, looks painful so my doula has been letting me get used to the whole process. Probably seen more than 10 expanded perinuems already.

All the videos of the hypnobirthing mums have been amazing. Extremely calm up to the last stage when they calmly breathe the baby out. Very inspiring and something I hope to achieve. Baby is always received in a calm, serene manner which I can imagine must be very comforting for a newborn suddenly brought into the human world.

Yesterday, we watched a whole video on Russian waterbirths and that really blew me away. I mean, it really alters all our preconceived notions of birth as painful, traumatic crisises.

Two of the couples looked like they were making love. The look on the mother's face as she moaned seriously looked more orgasmic than painful, in fact I think she was having an orgasm. The husband was also kissing her all over during her labour. Hahah, well, I think we won't be having that.. nurses in the hospital will freak out.

Another woman ( this one I totally take my hat off too) gave birth all by herself with her two toddler kids watching. And it was all done so naturally. She labored in a very serene manner in this like giant fish tank. Then when the time came for her to birth the baby, she just moved into a squatting position and slowly eased the baby out, ALL by HERSELF. As the baby's head came out, she could actually stroke the head and speak to her baby and also explain to her children what was happening. Hiyoh, talk about a totally calm state of mind. Simply amazing.

I am sure many mothers out there who have been through great pain in their labor might be saying to me : Yah, just you wait and see. I myself have probably read way too much, and the notion of that "transition" stage when you are at 8-9 cm dilated and the pain is undescribable and many women cave in.... contantly lurks at the back of my mind.

Still, as the big day approaches, I am slowly trying to unlearn the negative notions of birth that my mind has been conditioned to accept and revert back to a more natural notion of birth. Sometimes the less you know, the better. You just do it!

Rejection

2006-05-23T22:58:00.000+08:00

Ever since Ally started pre-school 2 weeks ago, she's been talking about one particular boy in her school.

Robert.

He's a Caucasian. German, to be precise. And Ally likes looking at him and hanging around him.

We thought it was pretty cute and used to remind her about him whenever she refused to go to school.

Till today.

My mother-in-law related to me this particular incident. The teachers teased Ally and asked who she likes. Dear sweet Ally pointed to Robert.

And you know what that Robert said?

"I like OTHER chinese people!"

Poor Ally. Don't know whether she understood what that statement meant. But when I heard it, I felt so protective of her.

How can anybody not like my Ally? Look at her! Trim, tan and pretty. :)

Hahah. Anyway, she has no recollection of the incident. So that's good.

Just taking things easy...

2006-05-17T14:06:00.000+08:00

The past week has been just plain relaxing. I haven't been doing anything, except going through the hypnobirthing relaxation exercises, reading magazines and taking long slow swims in the afternoon.

It was actually a decision made over the weekend that I just can't do everything. Last week, I was down with a very bad flu, took a round of antibiotics and went in to the shop over the weekend and on Monday and Tuesday. Then beginning of this week, fell ill again. My cough ( which is improving now) is so bad it kept me up 3 whole nights. It's the type where the itch is so bad you feel like you have to cough it out. I coughed till I thought there would be blood and my throat felt like someone had burned it. Mark remarked that my coughs were so violent he fancied little Angeline must be traumatised in my tummy with all that heaving and loud loud coughing sounds. Haha.

So, he actually ORDERED me to just rest! After all, my birth is just 2 weeks away or anytime now. I don't want to go into labour feeling sick and with this nasty cough. I totally agree. The violent nature of the coughs can probably push the baby out. I actually think it did pushed the baby lower as after last week, the baby has apparently got itself into position for birth, head at the neck of my pelvis opening. But my C-section scar actually hurt a bit too after all the coughing so that one not so good. I just better get myself well.

So, despite feeling like there are a thousand and one things to do before I go give birth, I've decided to just take things easy. And I think it's been a blessing. I was initially reluctant to leave the new part time staff I hired alone in the shop but she has turned out well, working better when I am not around even. Ha. Mark, the dear husband , has also started doing weekend shifts in the shop when it gets really busy so I can rest easy at home.

Guilty? Still feel like I should be doing more. But then health and baby come first. I will probably with grappling with conflictng emotions once the baby is born - fighting the need to rest and get back to work as quickly as possible. Hiyah, why do we stress ourselves out ah?

Taking the World by Calm

2006-05-08T22:34:00.000+08:00

So, I'm now well on my way in preparation for a smooth VBAC (Vaginal Birth After Caesarean).

I've switched doctors to the very famous, pro natural Paul Tseng from TMC. He is really calming and his caring knowledgeable manner reminds me of Goh Chok Tong! Ha. I met him last week and he has given the go ahead for a VBAC, stating that my chances for success are very high:

* My baby is a good smallish size
* There is a more than 18 month gap between my first delivery and this one
* The reason for the previous Csection is a non issue: no one can say the pelvic cavity of a normal healthy woman is too small for the baby. Only going through a trial of labour itself will determine if the cervix can dilate enough.

So, that’s one hurdle out of the way. My current doctor was totally comfortable with my switch and wished me well. She agreed that it was better if I went with Paul, as she would not have been comfortable with a doula and agreed that her style of managing labour is very different from Dr Tseng

I’ve also had my first hypnobirthing lesson with my doula Ginny Phang. She taught Mark and I how to turn all our negative thoughts into positive ones and how it is important to start “flowering” the positive thoughts and “ weeding” out the negative ones from now. Success of our VBAC is very much determined by our mindset! We were also taught a series of relaxation exercises and as homework, I have to listen to a CD which recites the positive affirmations and also lulls me into a 20 minute relaxation exercise.

Ha! Quite Hippie. I know some people will probably roll their eyes upwards at all this. Mark for one, can’t stop giggling whenever I am listening to my affirmations. I don’t blame him lah. I mean,you can’t expect him to relate to affirmations like:

"My cervix opens outward and allows my baby to ease down"

"My pelvis releases and opens as have those of countless women before during labour and birth."

He loves the 20 min relaxation exercise though, which fills you with all these positive energies. Barely a minute into the exercise, he will already have fallen asleep… snoring some more. Quite irritating as I will get distracted by his snoring as I try to relax. Men ah…

I can just imagine him sleeping as I “labour” to the CD in the delivery room, and having to wake him up when it’s time for the baby to be born.

So, anyway, 4 more weeks, maybe 5. I can’t wait. All this positive thinking is doing me good.

Dino Mania

2006-04-26T09:36:00.000+08:00

It was Gor gor David's birthday over the weekend. Unfortunately, we did not get much of Ally playing with the other kids. She was kinda preoccupied with her new friend, Dino.

Mark can't understand why she likes the ugly creature, when the dog is so much cuter! He forced her to take a photo with the dog.

But Ally's heart really lay with Dino ( Who I personally like too. the uglier, the cuter).

Oh, she really wanted to bring Dino home that day,

but the other kids really liked him too, so we left him at David's house. A lesson in giving for Ally and for me too (Haha, I couldn't bear to leave the ugly dino behind! Shermaine, we're not hinting here lah... ahahh)

I will have that VBAC ( Vaginal Birth After Caesarean)!

2006-04-24T13:45:00.000+08:00

I've been talking about this for some time now, but I hadn't quite made up my mind yet. But the courage to do so has grown as I read more and more on VBACs and especially after meeting Ginny Phang, the person I will engage as my doula.

Mark and I met her on Sunday. And her conviction, knowledge and just, "general warmth" impressed us. Plus she has a 90% success rate with VBACs and infact most of her clients are VBAC candidates. So, we felt like we were in good hands.

What's even more amazing is that after listening to her talk about birth without pain relief through "hypnobirthing," we are even going to try that out!

Can you imagine? From Caesarean TO natural birth, and even one possibly without pain relief! Ha.

Ok, it is not some gung ho decision I have just decided to make, throwing all caution and sanity to the wind.

For one, hypnobirthing is not some new age thing, where someone holds a pendulum infront of you and hypnotises you. And in fact, you don't lose control, but on the contrary, gain FULL control over yourself and your birth. From what I understand so far, it's is very much a "mind over matter" thing, teaching your mind and your body to relax, have control over the pain of each contraction and letting the natural birth process take over and proceed as efficiently as possible.

To me, that makes perfect sense. In everyday life, we tell ourselves to "calm down' whenever we get flustered or nervous before a big meeting or something. And overcoming panic almost always results in a successful outcome. I for one, am a true believer in positive thinking and strongly feel that once you set your mind to something, you can achieve it. At heart, I am actually quite a pessimist but willing myself to be positive, banishing negative thoughts has helped me go a long long way!

So, hypnobirthing makes sense to me and I want to give it a shot. Mark has expressed great concern though and does not want me to rule out epidural. So, I'm not going to but I want to try it out first. If I can't cope, I will use epidural. But let's see.

Tomorrow, I am going to meet a new doctor who is supportive of VBACS. If I like him, I will switch doctors. I love my current doctor at TMC but I just know I will not be able to do my VBAC with her , and I don't want to end up quarreling in the delivery suite. Ha, those of you who know me will know I am too mild to do that, so I will probably end up agreeing to a Caesearean again. So, it's best that I change doctors if I have decided to go ahead with my VBAC. What I need is support from all ends now.

Wish me luck as I embark on this new journey. I am not some new age mummy. Please, I am a no. 1 scaredy cat at times too. But I am more confident doing this the second time round and much more well informed. And I just want to have more control this time over how my birth turns out. If anything, I have to try for a natural birth now as success rates for a VBAC get lower the third time. So , this is it!